The Dark
by sassie69
Summary: Josh has to get back to DC by any means, drama and angst ensues. AU story
1. Chapter 1

The Dark

Genre: Slash /drama /AU

Coupling: Josh Lyman & Sam Seaborn

Rating: T

The characters belong to Aaron Sorkin, I am just borrowing them for fun.

Background:

Josh & Sam are in an established relationship and have been together since the first Bartlet campaign (see my other fic 'Putting the Past Behind You' rated M on .net – very dark & violent). Josh was in a car accident 2 years before and was paralysed. He now uses a wheelchair (sorry needed him to be less mobile for part of the plot to work).

Note: I live in the UK and am not a pilot. I apologise to any Americans or aviators if I have got things wrong please take it as poetic licence!

Chapter 1

The journey to Boulder hadn't been too bad. The commercial flight had gone smoothly and Carl, my ever suffering assistant, was a great help on the plane. Colorado was very pretty this time of year, if a little cold. I have to say though I would rather have been at home snuggled up with Sam than arguing environmental issues with an unrealistic bunch of greenies. Don't get me wrong I believe in most of their issues; however I am realistic enough to know that we cannot change the way most Americans think overnight. The fact that I have been sent here to meet with them shows how seriously this administration takes its environmental policy.

The meeting went better than I thought it would. There were some more moderate members of the local party that I had not met with before. We agreed after three hours that I would take a couple of their issues forward for further discussion at the White House. Ideas they had to lower carbon emissions and protect areas such as the Rio Grande Forest, if costly, had merit and would be interesting to investigate further on a larger scale. I was very pleased with the progress we had made as Carl and I made our way to meet Congressman John Myers for an official dinner meeting. After which we would go to the hotel and fly back tomorrow evening following two more meetings.

On our way to the meeting with the Congressman my cell rang – Leo.

"Hey Leo"

"How's it going down there?"

"Good. I think I may be a closet greenie. We're just on our way to meet with Myers"

"You've already come out of the closet once Josh, surely that's enough for one lifetime"

I laughed. "So what can I do for you Leo?"

"I need you to come back tonight. There's a problem with the vote"

"We're going to win, don't sweat it!"

"Josh, Feldman is insisting on meeting with you personally." He won't see anyone else and he's threatening to withdraw his support along with six others"

"I don't believe that guy!" What's his problem?" Josh frowned into the phone.

"He will only tell you and only face to face"

"How am I supposed to get back tonight?" "Myers is going to be pissed"

"I'll deal with Myers. Go pack your stuff and we'll work out how to get you back"

"Yeah ok"

"I'll call you as soon as we have made the arrangements"

"Sure, bye Leo"

Carl looked at me questioningly.

"We're going back to DC tonight. There's a problem with Feldman and the vote" I told him.

"I don't understand. You were only able to come here for this because the vote was a given. Sam and Toby were overseeing it"

"Yeah I know but Feldman is saying he will only talk to me and only face to face. I don't know why"

Carl thought for a moment "How are we getting back?"

"That I also don't know yet"

"Well as we are not having dinner with Myers, we better get something back at the hotel. You haven't eaten much all day"

"You know sometimes it's uncanny how you can channel Sam, Donna and my mother simultaneously!"

"I've been taking lessons!" Carl smiled

Chapter 2

"Senator Feldman as you know Josh is in Colorado. You told him you were with us on this. Please can we meet to discuss what the problem is?"

"I have already told you Sam. I have told Toby and even Leo. I will not back this anymore and nor will my friends until I have met with Josh"

"How about we get him on the phone for you, or linked up with a web-cam. Will that do?"

"No Sam I want to be in the same room as him"

"I know how you feel" Sam muttered under his breath. "Ok Senator we are trying to get him back as it is so important to you"

"Sam you and I both know this vote is important for the President, not for me. I now have reservations."

"I wish you would let me help you. I'll let you know when Josh is due back"

"Thanks Sam. I am sure Josh will be able resolve this issue"

Sam put the phone down went in search of Donna.

"Hey Donna. Have you managed to arrange a flight for Josh?"

"Not yet. There are no commercial flights until his one tomorrow"

"Damn it!" Sam thought for a moment. "What about trains, choppers, boats, private planes, or UFO's?"

Donna shot Sam her best 'Do you think I'm stupid look?'

"Sorry, guess you need me to leave you alone to sort this out uh?" Sam looked appropriately chastised.

"I would be able to do this more easily without you hovering yes. It was crazy to set this trip for him when there was a vote scheduled" Of course Sam if you really want to help you could speak to your friend Bob to see if there are any UFO's that could bring Josh back!"

"Very funny!" Sam snorted as he left Donna to it.

Chapter 3

We had been back at the hotel for an hour. I had showered and packed. I had even eaten under the watchful eye of Carl. I don't seem to be very hungry recently. Sam says I am losing weight. I don't know and it's not like I can stand on the bathroom scales Sam bought. His offer to carry me ended up being fun, but the scales wouldn't register both of us. I am sure he fell on to the bathroom carpet pulling me on top of him on purpose though!

We waited for the call to tell us how we were getting back. Carl didn't think there were any flights until the next day.

"Josh why don't you get some sleep, you look tired."

"Carl, I'm fine. Anyway I would just get to sleep and then Leo will call and I'll have to get up again"

"Ok. You want to play cards?" Carl grinned. He had been playing cards with Josh for a while now and Josh very seldom won but hated to lose.

"Yeah come on then you can wipe the floor with me again. Are you sure you aren't cheating?" I never used to be this bad at cards!"

"You can't bluff Josh. You are terrible at hiding your feelings."

"Sam says I have a terrible poker face. I don't see how that can be I bluff Republicans all the time" Josh wrinkled his nose as he said Republicans.

"That may be, but outside of politics you can be read like a book"

"Whatever. Just deal my cheating friend"

Laughing, Carl dealt the cards and they carried on playing waiting for the phone to ring. Josh losing 3 times as many hands as Carl.

Chapter 4

"Ok Donna what have you managed to sort out?"

"He's not going to like it Leo" Donna handed Leo the details of the arrangements she had made

"Is this the only way?" Leo handed the papers to Sam as Toby read them over his shoulder

Donna was exasperated and it showed in her tone "It's the best we can do. The only way to get him back in time to see Senator Feldman"

Sam had paled slightly. "You can't put him on a small private airplane!" How the hell is he going to get on board a small Cessna?"

"Sam calm down. We have to get him back tonight"

"But Leo!" Sam stared at Leo as the older man held up a hand to silence him. Toby placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

Leo took a deep breath. "Thanks Donna I'll call Josh and give him the details. He's less likely to shout at me" "Toby fill CJ in she'll be finished with her meeting soon"

Looking around the room Leo dismissed the assembled staff.

Walking back to the communications bullpen Sam's body language showed his displeasure.

"Come in to my office Sam"

Sam followed Toby in and shut the door.

"OK what's bothering you Sam?"

Sam paused to gather his thoughts slumping down on the couch. He looked up at Toby who was leaning against his desk. "He hates small planes. Even before the accident. They scare him. Also how is he going to get on the plane? They don't have platforms for those small planes, do they? It's all being done in a hurry, no time to prepare for his needs. You know in all probability he is going to have to be carried on. He'll hate it. It will embarrass him." Sam eyes were wet with unshed tears of frustration that he could do nothing to spare the man he loved such an ordeal.

"You know he will do whatever is required. He serves at the pleasure of the President"

"I know but I also know how it will make him feel. The loss of dignity being carried on a plane in view of others. Can you imagine it Toby? Would you want someone you love to go through that?" Sam sighed, leaned back and closed his eyes

At that moment CJ came in. Toby filled her in on the details. She was also worried how it would affect Josh.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews.

Acknowledgements are on first page

The Dark continues

CHAPTER 5

Senator Feldman sat at the desk in his office nervously clicking the pen in his hand. The man in the visitor's chair silently stood and removed the offending article from the Senator's unresisting fingers. He sat down again and sighed. "You better call Sam Seaborn. He wants the details"

Reluctantly Feldman reached for the phone and connected to his assistant. "Get me Sam Seaborn" The two men exchanged a look, knowing they were so far down a road they could never come back from.

"Hi Senator. Have you had a change of heart?"

Feldman almost choked on the unintended irony of the question. "No Sam I haven't. I want to be sure I am being taken seriously. Is Josh coming back to DC?"

"Yes Senator he will be boarding a plane soon. I promise"

"Not that I don't trust you Sam but I don't see how that is possible. The are no flights tonight"

"I assure you we have chartered a Cessna out of Littleton Airfield. He will come straight into Potomac Airfield. He takes off in one hour and lands at 11pm. He will go straight to your office from the airfield. Ok?"

"Ok. I can see you are serious. Is he on his own? I hate to think of him making that journey unassisted" The Senator knew he was pushing his luck, but figured it might be a deemed a reasonable query as Josh was a wheelchair user.

Sam controlled his sense of outrage that surfaced whenever someone implied Josh might be less than able. "Just the pilot, Billy Jones, and his assistant Carl, he'll be there don't worry"

"Right, thanks Sam". The Senator hung up and immediately placed a call on a cell phone he had taken out of his pocket. He relayed the information Sam had given him. When he finished he leaned back and rubbed his eyes. Then looking at his companion whispered, "So it begins"

The other man stood to leave. "I'll tell the others." Then turning back to Feldman, "You know we had no choice, and we may not like their methods but part of me says they are not wrong. The world can afford to lose someone like him. I mean what's he really got going for him?"

Shocked at the words he had just heard Feldman couldn't answer. He didn't want this but he was one of seven, and he couldn't go against them.

The other man left without his answer, leaving Feldman to stew.

CHAPTER 6

Carl and Josh were restlessly watching TV in the hotel room, cards having been abandoned due to the fact Josh was getting grouchy: a combination of waiting and losing.

"Lyman" Josh almost screamed into his cell phone

"Josh we've made arrangements for you to fly out of Littleton Airfield into Potomac. You should be sitting down with Feldman by 11.30 tonight"

"Ok Leo. Wait what type of plane is this? I'm assuming it's not a 747!"

"Josh relax. It is a smaller plane than a 747 but you'll be fine" Josh couldn't see Leo's grimace as he concealed the true size of the plane and the fact that Josh would have to be carried on to it

"OK" Josh didn't sound too sure. "We'll get a cab straight away. How long before we take off?"

"One and a half hours. Josh I really appreciate you doing this" Leo gave himself away with this statement.

"It's a really small plane isn't it Leo?" Josh's voice was quiet and a little shaky

"Yes son it is."

Carl moved over to Josh as he saw his face pale even more that normal and took the phone as his hands shook a little.

"Hi Leo. You want to give me the details and I'll get Josh there? He just needs a minute. You know how he feels about small planes."

Leo gave the details to Carl. "Carl there's one more thing. You might want to wait until he's there to tell him this. You and the pilot are going to have to carry him on"

Carl glanced at Josh. "Ok Leo I'll do that. See you later"

"I'll call a cab and take the bags down. You coming Josh?"

Josh gulped, took a deep breath and collected himself, "Right behind you"

CHAPTER 7

"Hey"

"Hey" Josh's smile was reflected in his voice

"Where are you?"

"In the cab on the way to the airfield. I have to say I'm not crazy about this at all."

"It's not a long flight Josh and just think we'll be together tonight instead of tomorrow night"

The smile was now a grin, "There is that. I am sure I am going to be very in need of stress relief by the time I have flown in a tin can and sorted out whatever has got up Feldman's ass"

Sam felt the heat in his groin as he thought about how he could relieve Josh of his stress. "I am sure that could be arranged, "he almost purred down the phone. "Want me to give you some details?"

Josh choked, blushing as Carl was sitting next to him in the cab trying to ignore the obvious way this conversation was going, but failing to suppress a grin at Josh's discomfort. "No that's ok babe. Thank you though."

The cab came to a stop and Carl got out.

"Will you call me before you take off, once you're on the plane?" The anxiety in Sam's voice came through and Josh wondered what he was missing.

"Sure I will. We're here. Sam is everything ok?"

"I just know how you feel about small planes. I love you"

"Yeah love you too. Call you when I am on board ok?"

"'Kay"

"You ready to get out Josh?" Carl's voice broke into his thoughts from the open car door next to Josh. He hadn't even notice Carl get out and get his wheelchair from the trunk

"Sure" He transferred across to the wheelchair and pushed off towards the small terminal building. Carl followed with the bags.

CHAPTER 8

Once inside Carl located Billy Jones and together they walked over to Josh.

"Josh this is Billy Jones our pilot"

Extending his hand to the young man, "Pleased to meet you Billy. Thanks for doing this at such short notice. Is everything ok?"

Billy took Josh's hand and briefly shook it. "Happy to be helping the Whitehouse Mr Lyman. I did the routine checks on the plane as soon as I heard. She's fuelled up and ready. I have been in here for the last hour finalising the route. Just need to get you and your luggage boarded and we can be on our way."

"Please call me Josh. Lead the way" Josh and Carl followed Billy out onto the tarmac to a very small plane. The door was open revealing the built in stairs.

Josh stopped and took in the size of the plane "Buddy Holly small" he muttered under his breath. His eyes then came to rest on the door, well the stairs to be more accurate. Carl watched Josh take it all in and could see the exact moment when the penny dropped.

"Billy please tell me you have some sort of ramp or platform to get me in there" Josh's voice was quite high pitched.

"No sorry there hasn't been time to arrange anything and anyway there isn't really anything like that for his plane. It's too small."

"Josh we are going to lift you to your seat and your chair goes in the luggage compartment under the plane." Carl's tone was telling Josh that this was just how it was and there could be no discussion. "We need to hurry"

Ignoring Carl's tone, Josh clarified loudly "You mean carry me. You're going to carry me onto the plane"

"Yes we are. I am sorry I know you are going to hate it, but we need to get you back to DC tonight and this is the only way we can get there" Carl's tone was now placatory. He had knelt down next to Josh and was looking him straight in the eye.

"Perfect! I not only have to go in a flying tin can but I get carried on like a piece of luggage!" Josh managed a slight grin which softened his words.

"You ready Josh?" Carl was still kneeling on the tarmac

Deep sigh, "Yeah let's get going. Just don't drop me."

Carl explained to Bill how to hold Josh at the back of his thighs just above his knees. He took Josh's top half and walked backwards up the stairs into the plane. Josh held tightly to Carl's hands across his chest. Carl could feel Josh's breathing increase and knew he was somewhat distressed about the whole thing. He leaned down to Josh's ear after they had got him into his seat, "Are you going to be ok?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I could do with some water though, please"

Carl handed him a bottle of water and left him to get the luggage and help Billy. Josh got out his cell phone an hit speed dial one.

"Hey. You on board?"

"Yes. You all knew didn't you? You could have warned me!"

"We did but we thought the anticipation of being carried on might be worse that just having to deal with it quickly at the time. I'm sorry if that was wrong, but we were thinking of you. I didn't want you to get really stressed on the way there"

"I guess."

"Are you sulking?"

"I don't sulk"

Sam laughed, "Yes you do and you know it"

"Ok, but I'm not this time"

"If you say so babe"

Josh could see Carl getting into his seat and Billy was starting the engine.

"I have to go, we're about to leave"

"I'll see you soon. Love you"

"You too" Josh reluctantly switched his phone off and put it in his suit jacket pocket. He had taken of his coat as soon as he was settled in his seat. He checked his seatbelt was secure one more time.

"Ok gentlemen we are now ready for take off, next stop Washington DC.

Please let me know whet you think

TBC

"


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for the reviews.

Acknowledgements are on first page

The Dark continues

CHAPTER 9

"Just to let you know Josh is wheels up and is expected to land at 11 tonight as scheduled." Sam felt he should keep Senator Feldman informed. He couldn't work out what the problem was and hoped the more he spoke to him the more chance there was he would give Sam a hint.

"Thanks Sam, that's good to know." He couldn't see the Senator's hands shaking as he picked up the bottle of bourbon to pour himself another drink. "You don't have to keep calling, I trust you." In truth the Senator was extremely uncomfortable talking to Josh's partner. He felt he might give something away.

"Ok then. Josh will see you later." Sam hung up the phone still unhappy that Josh was being made to return by a man who was essentially holding votes hostage. "And we don't negotiate with terrorists!" He found himself muttering wryly.

In his office Senator Feldman was drinking in an attempt to numb his troubled conscience. He wasn't expecting to see Josh later.

His office door quietly opened and was closed by the man who had entered. "You need to pull yourself together Feldman. You're going to give the game away." The man took the bottle out of the Senator's reach.

"You shouldn't be here. Why are you here?" The tall blond man didn't answer the Senator's question.

"Is it done?" Feldman's voice was barely more than a whisper as he made eye contact with his visitor.

"It's done. The idiot pilot left the plane unattended for an hour. My sources tell me it was a piece of cake." The man grinned smugly, his eyes flashing with something that chilled Feldman to the core.

CHAPTER 10

I cannot believe that bastard Feldman is pulling this stunt. I don't know what's got into the guy. His vote was committed and now he's threatening to withdraw his and six more. Man I can do without this! Now here I am in a flying tin can having been carried, carried on, like some piece of baggage. I know it was the only way but I really hate it. I suppose on the plus side I get to sleep in the same bed as Sam tonight. I just have to convince Feldman to stick to our original agreement. I so can't wait to get to DC and get out of this thing.

"Hey Josh, how are you doing?" Carl looked across the aisle at his boss who had been unusually quiet since take off.

"I'll be fine once we land and I'm out of this tin can" Josh managed a small smile which didn't reach his eyes. They were screaming get me out of here!

"We'll be over the National Forest soon, not that you can see it at night." Billy called back to them.

"Great" was the enthusiastic response from Carl.

"Yeah great" Josh couldn't hide the sarcasm in his voice.

To while away the time and divert Josh, he and Carl bounced possible theories back and forth trying to guess what Senator Feldman's problem was. The theories became more and more bizarre as the flight progressed. Carl maintained that he must have been taken over by pod people and warned Josh to stay away as he would become one too. Josh countered with the theory that the Senator was actually a closet transvestite and lover of Mary Marsh so was being blackmailed by the left and the right. After a while both Josh and Carl drifted off to sleep.

"Noting but trees for miles underneath us fellas," Billy called to his sleeping companions. Not getting a response he shrugged went back to the task of flying a small aircraft at night.

It was the noise and the vibration that woke them rather than Billy's desperate cries.

"What the hell?" Josh screamed to Billy trying to be heard over the noise.

"I'll go and see Josh, don't worry." Carl undid his seatbelt and went forward to speak to Billy.

"Billy what's going on?" Billy seemed to be fighting with the controls.

"I don't know. Something's very wrong. I can't keep her up and the radio's not responding." Billy was now strangely calm despite having to shout to be heard. "Strap yourselves in we're going down."

CHAPTER 11

"I'm stuffed. No more pizza ever" Sam sat back on Toby's office couch holding his stomach.

"So no room for pie then. Good more for me." Toby grabbed a piece of lime pie before Sam could respond.

"Spanky! Just the person" Sam groaned as CJ plonked herself next to him on the couch.

"What have I done now, CJ?"

"It's more what you are going to do." CJ grinned as Sam's looked at her with dread.

"What am I going to do?" Resigned to whatever course of action she was going to steer him on. Too tired to put up a fight and knowing from past experience that resistance was futile.

"There's s group of high school seniors visiting the White House next month. They have asked to meet with you and Josh specifically."

"Why us?"

"They're a gay alliance group who want to discuss discrimination and attitudes to gay people working in public service" Seeing Sam's face CJ went on, "They competed against other schools and groups for this opportunity to have a meeting o a subject of their choosing with a Senior Staffer."

"They get two senior staff though"

"Sam you guys have been out for years. Josh since college and you since the first campaign. I know you don't want to be poster boys but you are excellent role models for young gay people. I don't believe it would do any harm to give them what they ask for. You don't have to answer anything you are uncomfortable with." CJ reached for the last piece of pie and grinned wickedly at Toby.

"Yeah ok we'll do it in principle. I will have to check with Josh though. I don't see there being a problem.

Charlie burst into the office making them all jump. "You all have to go to the Oval now"

Sam, Toby and CJ glanced at each other briefly before hurrying after Charlie. The President and Leo were at the desk in the oval office listening to someone on the speaker phone. The trio followed Charlie in and quietly waited to learn what the new crisis was.

"Thanks Paul, let us know the minute you have more information" Leo disconnected the call. He and the President turned to the four expectant faces.

"Please sit." President Bartlet gestured for his staff, including Charlie, to sit on the couches while he and Leo took the chairs.

Jed Bartlet took a breath and looked at Sam. "Ten minutes ago we were informed that Billy Jones did not make his last scheduled call to the control tower."

Sam paled and CJ reached out to touch his arm. "What do you mean? Have they crashed?" Sam's voice got higher and louder as he asked the questions.

Leo spoke calmly, fixing his sympathetic eyes on the moist blue ones of the younger man. "We really don't know. It could be they went off course for some reason. The last time they were heard of they were on course about to go over the National Forest. That was an hour ago. Billy was meant to check in with designated control towers as they flew from Colorado to DC. He missed the last one."

Sam stood abruptly and took out his cell phone. "I'm calling Josh". Sam hit speed dial 1. "Damn it voicemail!" Calls to Carl got the same result.

CJ stood and gently took Sam's cell from his shaking hand. Holding him to her she tried to offer what comfort she could. Over his shoulder she exchanged looks with the other occupants of the room, each silently conveying the hope that this was a system malfunction as they didn't know how Sam would cope if anything were to happen to Josh.

Please tell me what you think

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks for the reviews.

Acknowledgements are on first page

Notes for you sweet geeks out there:

I have a phone. I make calls on it. It works. I am British.

I am not totally up on all things technical and especially US; however research has indicated that GPS has been a feature in all US cell phones since 2005. Many service providers had this as an option from 2001 as advised after 9/11. It is automatically triggered on a 911 call, but phones have to be switched on and have to have the function set to be tracked if not making a 911 call. IF the phone even has the function.

The timeline for this is roughly 2003. Josh got shot and had a car accident a year later (oh come on we know he is destined for a life of guilt, angst and bad luck!). How can he be a fixer with nothing to fix??!!

The Dark continues

CHAPTER 12

I'm in the car. I don't understand. I thought that was all over. I thought I was rescued. Oh my god it was all a dream. I'm still here! Ok now calm down, get it together. Think! Think!

I'm so cold and it's so dark I can't see a thing. It's raining, it's night. Why am I wet? It's raining on me. The roof came off? No, that doesn't make sense. Come on Lyman get a grip.

Facts, I need facts. What do I know for sure? My head hurts, my left arm really hurts. I can't feel my legs. I have a belt across my lap.

I'm so tired, maybe just a little sleep would be good to clear my head.

A FEW MINUTES LATER

Right, still here. Perhaps sleeping isn't a good idea. I'll need to stay awake and work out where I am. This definitely doesn't feel like my Audi and the lap belt is like you get on an airplane. Airplane! I'm on an airplane but this seat is too small for Air Force One. So where the hell am I and why am I on a plane?

Deep breaths, in and out in and out, dial it down Joshua, dial it down. This is so scary. It's ok I'm not in the car. I got out of the car. This is something different.

A LITTLE BIT LATER

I really have to stay awake. Ok status report. Head? Hurts but a bit clearer. Arm? Ow! Still hurts and not moving much. Legs? Still not moving or feeling anything. Raining? Yes. Dark? Too much. Airplane, airplane, why am I on an airplane. FELDMAN! THE VOTE!

Flying back to DC to sort out Feldman. So the leg thing is normal for me, arm and head not so much. Billy Jones! I was with Billy Jones and Carl. Carl!

"Carl?"

"Billy?"

"Anyone there?"

"Hey guys are you ok?"

Nothing. Shit! Ok what do I do? I can't get up to try to find them. I really wish it would stop raining. I'm so cold.

"Hey Carl, Billy!" Silence.

I wish Sam was here. Sam! Where the hell did I put my phone? Pocket, got it. Just have to open it and switch it on one-handed without dropping it. Wow managed that. Speed dial 1.

CHAPTER 13

The occupants of the Oval all jumped as Sam's cell phone rang.

"Josh?" Sam held his breath.

"Sam we need help. The plane crashed. Sam I can't see Carl. He's not answering when I call, neither is Billy." The panic and fear in Josh's voice was heartbreaking.

"Josh we are going to find you. We have a good idea where you are." Sam expelled the breath and put the phone on speaker.

"Josh, it's Ron. Can you see or hear anything?"

"No! It's so dark I can't see a thing. I can only hear the wind in the trees."

"We know you are in the forest and roughly where you are. We already have teams trying to locate you." Jed Bartlet tried to reassure the obviously frightened younger man.

"Babe you need to stay calm and wait for the rescue team to get to you. Are you hurt?" Sam dreaded the answer but needed to ask the question.

"I must have hit my head it hurts and is a bit fuzzy. I think my left arm is broken. I was strapped into the seat. I think there is a hole in the roof. It's raining on me. I'm so cold and tired Sam."

"Stay with me Josh. Don't go to sleep." Sam was speaking as if no one else was in the room.

"Sam what if Carl and Billy didn't make it?" Josh's voice was shaking with emotion. Everyone listening to Josh looked at each other, knowing that was a possibility. That Josh was in reality alone.

"Josh don't think about that now. They were probably just knocked out so can't answer." Sam tried to sound more convincing than he felt.

"Sam I keep thinking that maybe the plane isn't on the ground. You know stuck in the trees. What if, what if it is and it falls. I can't tell where it is."

"Babe concentrate on what we do know and try not to worry about what we don't. You'll drive yourself crazy that way."

"Josh how much battery power have you got?" Ron avoided Sam's eyes as he asked this.

"I don't, I'll look. I've got one bar"

"Josh you are going to have to hang up and preserve the battery."

"NO!" Please!" Josh was distraught.

"Josh hang up and we will call you back when we are closer to you" Ron insisted.

"Ron please don't, can't you hear how scared he his?" Sam was almost in tears"

"Josh we will call you in a while. Try to keep warm and stay awake." Ron ended the call on Sam's phone.

Sam stared at Ron.

"Sam we will need to speak to him later. If we keep him on the phone his battery will run out more quickly. Ron left no room for argument.

There was a knock on the door and then in walked Mike Casper. He nodded to everyone in the room, "Good evening Mr President," Mike greeted as he quickly squeezed Sam's shoulder.

"What have you got Mike?"

"Rescue teams are on their way. They believe they have a good idea where the plane went down and are hopeful of recovery in no more than three hours." Mike reported.

"That's good." Leo sat down and rubbed his face with his hands.

"Mike is there any indication as to what happened?" Toby had a bad feeling about the whole situation.

"Not yet. The plane appeared to be sound and the pilot is very experienced. We'll have to wait until we recover it to know for sure." Mike paused. "Just out of curiosity what was Josh doing on the plane anyway. He hates small aircraft?"

"Feldman! I better tell Feldman." Sam went to use the phone.

CHAPTER 14

"Sam you're kidding. Josh's plane went down Oh my god. Is he hurt?"

"A little. I just wanted you to know. Please would you reconsider your vote in light of the circumstances, or at least speak to me about it?" Feldman made eye contact with the man in his office.

"Don't worry about that now Sam. I am sure we can get the vote rescheduled."

Sam was surprised. "Thanks Senator."

"Keep in touch Sam. I would like to know how Josh is."

Ending the call Feldman watched as the man used his cell phone. "Marco it didn't work Lyman's still alive." He visibly cringed at the expletive laden tirade that came from the phone.

"He's not happy." The man called Masters relayed to Feldman.

"That better not change our arrangement. We kept our side of the bargain. You and Marco better keep yours."

"You can tell your fellow conspirators that their debt is paid. Marco will no doubt find another way to get Lyman. Just be clear what he is capable of just in case your conscience ever starts to get the better of you. It's personal with Lyman but with you it would just be business. Understand?"

Feldman nodded, "Yes I understand."

Masters stared at the Senator briefly before leaving him alone in the office.

Senator Feldman took a moment to collect himself and made an internal call.

"It's me. We must all meet tonight at the club."

"No problem. Midnight"

"Yes fine." Feldman hung up the phone and left his office turning the light off and locking the door behind him.

CHAPTER 15

"Carl! Billy! Come on guys rise and shine!" Still no reply.

I'm so cold now at least my arm doesn't hurt as much. I really want to call Sam again but I know Ron is right. I need to save the battery. Perhaps I should switch it off. No then they won't be able to call me. I wish Carl or Billy would answer me. I hope they are just unconscious. Carl's wife will kill me if anything happens to him. She likes the fact he works at the White House but would rather he didn't travel around the country. I was shot and had a serious car accident so she thinks I am bad luck. Guess she's right!

I have to stop thinking about the accident, but the cold, dark and quiet brings it all back. The deserted icy road, braking for that animal (what was that some sort of moose?!) going through the barrier and then down into the ravine. The cold and dark. The fear of not being found. The fear of not being able to feel my legs, not being able to move. The shallow icy water seeping cold into my very bones. Five hours alone going in and out of consciousness, desperately praying I'd see Sam just one more time. To be able to tell him how much I love him.

Here I am again cold and alone. Hey I'm holding a pity party. Snap out of it Lyman. They're on their way. They know where you are, it's not like last time.

Feedback gratefully received

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Thanks for the reviews.

Acknowledgements are on first page

CHAPTER 16

Sam did not notice Donna enter his office as first. He was staring off in to the distance a troubled expression on his face. He looked exhausted and the redness of his eyes betrayed the tears he had shed.

"Sam." She called softly as she put some soup and coffee down on the desk in front of him. "Sam."

"Huh." He looked up at her and smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry I was miles away."

"They'll have them soon and then tomorrow Josh will be back in DC arguing about taking some time off to rest." The reassurance was as much for herself as for Josh's distraught lover. She loved her boss like a brother and they were mutually protective of each other.

"I keep thinking of him there unable to move. Carl and the pilot either too injured to respond or worse. He must be so scared. He sounded terrified. He was so cold. What if he gets hypothermia, people die from that don't they?"

"Sam have something to eat. You'll need to keep your strength up if you're going to have to look after Josh when he gets back. He will come back Sam." Donna pushed the soup towards him and moved the visitors' chair closer before sitting down in it. "I even brought you some coffee, but don't tell Josh that."

"I won't, I promise." Laughing quietly he began to eat the soup. Satisfied Donna started on hers.

They were silent for a while, and then Donna asked, "Is Rachel coming to DC or staying in Florida until she hears something more?"

"She said she would check out flights and call me to let me know. Once she knew Josh was alive and soon to be rescued she thought she might wait until tomorrow." They both looked at each other knowing how hard all this must be on Josh's mother. Rachel Lyman was a strong woman, however losing a daughter, her husband and nearly losing her son twice before must be taking its toll. At 68 years old she was fit for her age but the emotional wear and tear she had undergone would have finished a lesser person.

Donna's thoughts turned to Carl's wife. "Cindy decided to stay at home rather than come to the White House. She wanted to stay with the baby and her aunt is with her."

Sam thought for a moment. "How old is the baby now?"

"Five months. She's lovely. I went to see her last week."

"Getting broody there Donna?" Sam teased trying to lighten the mood. They both understood the impact on his wife Cindy if Carl didn't make it.

Donna blushed. She had only recently got engaged to Peter Collins the Vice-President's Communications Director. "Someday, but I think it's a little too soon to be planning a family. Maybe after the wedding"

"You know I keep thinking about how great it would be if Josh and I could get married. We've been together for years now. We should be able to make that commitment to each other. Something legally recognised. We hold power of attorney for one another, we have joint finances etcetera. Why won't they let us get married? Every time it's proposed in a bill someone from the religious right manages to knock it down; so much for separation of church and state!" Sam slammed his hand down on the desk making Donna jump.

Donna placed her hand over Sam's stroking with her thumb. "He knows how much you love him Sam. I know you can't legally get married but what about a commitment ceremony?"

"Yeah maybe." Sam sighed and slumped back in the chair. He just wanted it all to be over and have Josh home safe and sound.

They sat in a companionable silence each with their own thoughts.

CHAPTER 17

The phone on Sam's desk rang making them both jump this time.

"Sam Seaborn."

Sam listened. "Hi Rachel. How are you? When are you coming? Donna's here with me I'll put you on speaker."

"Hi Donna. Have you heard anything more Sam? Have you spoken to him again?" Rachel Lyman sounded very anxious.

"I know the rescue team should be there within the next hour and a half. I haven't spoken to him again as they want him to save what battery power he has left. To be honest I'm finding it very difficult to not call him. He's sitting there with a phone and I could be comforting him but Ron won't let me."

Rachel sighed, "I know I have thought about it, but Ron is right."

"How are you holding up Rachel?" Josh's mom had told her to stop calling her Mrs Lyman years ago.

"As can be expected; at least we know he's alive and will be on his way home soon. How's he going to manage with a broken arm, Sam?"

"I thought about that. I'm not sure, perhaps an electric chair for a while. He won't want to be pushed everywhere. Luckily he doesn't weigh too much and I work out as I think I might have to lift him in and out of bed!"

"He won't like that!"

The conversation was interrupted by another phone ringing. Sam's cell was showing Josh as the caller.

"Hang on Rachel I think Josh is calling. I'll put him on speaker too so you can hear."

"Josh? You're not meant to use your phone honey. Are you OK?"

"I know Sam but I can hear them calling me, they're here." Josh's phone beeped to indicate low battery.

"That's great. I thought we were calling you though to tell you when they were nearly there. Never mind they're there that's the main thing. Josh your mom is on my desk phone on speaker she can hear you." Sam was a little confused as to why no one had called Josh or him.

"Hey Mom, I can't talk for long the phone's dying, but I love you and I'll see you soon. I hope you are coming to see us."

Rachel was close to tears. "My darling boy of course I'm coming. I'm so relieved to hear your voice. I love you. See you soon."

"See you soon Mom. Sam, Carl and Billy still aren't answering." Josh's voice wavered and then he was gone. The phone battery was now dead.

"What happened Sam? Did he get cut off?"

"I think his battery died. I'm going to speak to Ron now so see where they will be taking Josh and when he will be back in DC."

"I'll be at National at 10am tomorrow. I'll call you to see where I need to go. Don't worry about picking me up, concentrate on Josh."

"See you tomorrow, bye Rachel"

"Bye Rachel"

"Bye Sam, Donna"

Sam hung up the phone and headed for the Oval to speak to Ron. He wasn't happy that no one had told him or Josh that the rescue team was there. He wanted to know why.

CHAPTER 18

The small private room was silenced as the steward served drinks to the seven men within. Once he was sure the door was closed and they were alone again Senator Feldman continued speaking.

"Our part is done now, I have their assurance we will be left alone as long as we keep quiet." He looked around the room at the faces of men who had as much to lose as he did. "We just have to keep quiet."

"What if they try to blackmail us again? What's to stop them?" The man asking wore glasses and nervously pushed them back up his nose repeatedly. He addressed the rest of the group not just Feldman.

Feldman was the one who responded. "We know what they did. We can expose them if they ever come to us again. They know that. This was a personal thing with Lyman. I'm not even totally sure what it was about."

"He's a worthless crippled faggot Jew seemed to be their point." Feldman hated this man and his sick opinions.

"It was more personal than that with these guys. Yes they had an issue with his sexuality and religion but it was Josh Lyman himself that they wanted. I for one would rather put it behind me and not ask any more questions." Feldman searched the faces in the room for agreement and was relieved to see most of the men nodding in assent.

The youngest man there looked thoughtful before confirming, "So we can vote how we want now right?"

"Yes. The idea was just to appear like we were holding out to ensure Lyman had to be brought back quickly." One of the others concurred.

"I am still struggling with this. They used us to kill a man!"

"Keep your voice down!" Feldman hissed. "Anyway he's not dead and we didn't know what they really wanted. All we did was to hold up a vote, nothing else. They did the rest. We are not guilty of anything else." Feldman hoped if he said it enough times even he would believe it.

"So where do we go from here? Do we carry on or do we tell them we are no longer taking their money?" The man with piercing blue eyes looked around at the assembled politicians. All well dressed and fed, used to the high life' living off "donations" from Health Maintenance Organisations (HMO's). These illegal payments channelled though a complex maze of financial institutions bought the HMO's the people in power they needed and gave those people the lifestyle they aspired to.

They had been uncovered by Marco's organisation, so they could be discovered again. Would they risk it?

As each man looked at one another they knew they would.

CHAPTER 19

They're here, thank god. I'm so cold I've been finding it difficult to stay awake. I've been clutching the phone for dear life waiting for Ron or someone to call. Strange they didn't. Rescue team must be having some trouble with their radios. I wish I could get a response from Carl. He was sitting just over the aisle and in front. I can't remember if he sat down before we crashed. It's so dark still I can't even see that far away. Lights, I can see the lights and hear them calling.

"I'm here, over here!" A light shines in my eyes blinding me. I put my hand up to shield them. "I'm ok; please check Carl and the pilot Billy. I haven't been able to get an answer from them."

"The pilot's dead Mr Lyman. Someone is checking on your assistant." The voice behind the light sounded matter of fact, all business. "Let me look at you."

The light approached me still shining in my face, "Hey could you lower the light please, it's really hard to see." I heard voices but the light wasn't lowered.

"Your assistant is dead too."

The words echoed though out my head. "Your assistant is dead." Carl is dead. Oh my god. I can't breathe. Cindy and the baby; She'll be devastated. The light got closer.

"Mr Lyman we have to get you out."

"Are you sure he's dead?" I know I sounded pathetic but I didn't care.

The light was lowered as the man in uniform knelt down next to me. "Yes very sure. We have to get you out of here. Your arm is obviously injured. I can't see any blood on your legs but your head is bleeding a little. Do you have any pain anywhere else?"

I mentally roused myself and did an inventory. "No, nowhere else."

"I am going to sedate you to get you out. Then we'll get you into the carry chair and to the medical facility."

I did not want to be sedated. "NO! NO sedation!"

"Sorry that's not negotiable." Before I knew it my good arm was being held by strong hands while the person next to me cut the sleeve of my shirt and jacket to access my veins for the injection. I struggled but to no avail. I felt the sting and then nothing.

CHAPTER 20

As Sam approached the Oval Charlie came out. He had been stopped by Ed and Larry needing input on an issue and asking about Josh.

"Hey Sam I was just coming to get you. They're just about to call Josh."

"What?" Confused Sam followed Charlie into the President's office.

"Hi Sam, the rescue team will be there in about 15 minutes so we are going to call Josh."

"I don't understand. They were already there. I spoke to him."

The room occupants all stared at Sam.

Ron was the first to recover. "Sam I told you not to call Josh. I was very clear on that."

"I didn't call him. He called me to say the rescue team was there." Sam's voice was a little louder than it should be taking into account where he was standing.

"Sam I don't understand Josh called you? When?" President Bartlet thought he was missing something here.

"Half an hour ago he called me on my cell and said the rescue team was there but he still hadn't heard a sound from Carl or the pilot. Then his phone went dead." Sam paced the room in exasperation. How difficult was this to understand!

Ron immediately licked up the phone. "Put me in direct communication with the team leader, now!"

Ron put the phone on speaker and the room occupants waited.

"Major Murdoch here sir," the phone crackled.

"Major I am here with the President and Senior Whitehouse staff. We need to know the current status of your team."

"We are at the crash site sir. The pilot is dead, having been thrown out of the plane. We found his body on the trail. We are going inside now. There is one person here. He's alive but unconscious. I believe it is Mr Lyman's assistant. I don't understand Mr Lyman is not here sir. I repeat Mr Lyman is not on the plane."

Sam collapsed on the couch, shaking uncontrollably. CJ and Toby slumped down either side of him, and Leo sat heavily in a chair as the President slipped down in his desk chair.

"Get Carl the hell out of there to a medical facility and draft in extra teams to search the area for Josh Lyman. We have reason to believe he has been abducted." Ron disconnected the call.

Feedback very welcome

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Thanks for the reviews.

Acknowledgements are on first page

CHAPTER 21

As the men left the club Feldman hung back to observe Senator Coleman. This was a man who had repeated expressed derogatory opinions about Josh Lyman. The man made him uneasy. He had known Coleman was a homophobe and somewhat of a racist, however his comments had seemed extreme even for him. He stood in the shadows and watched as Coleman used his cell phone as soon as he was outside and out of earshot. Feldman got as close as he dared and listened.

"So when do I get my money Masters?" Coleman's voice was quiet but demanding.

"Yeah well I can't be held responsible for that. I got you these guys didn't I? I expect you to pay me like we agreed. I told you they would all roll over and screw Lyman rather than risk being caught. There was never any question of me being at risk really. Easy money; you just have to get it to me." Coleman laughed softly and listened.

"Okay. I'll see you there at 4 tomorrow." Closing his phone Coleman smiled and walked off to his car.

Feldman released the breath he had been holding. The realisation that Coleman had played them was stunning in one sense but unsurprising in another. He was right there is no way any of the group would have seriously considered not capitulating to the blackmail. They were an easy target and he was getting paid by Masters, and therefore Marco, for handing them over. Feldman felt sick to his stomach. Sick and ashamed of what he had become. He was relieved that they hadn't killed Josh but was concerned about whether they would stop pursuing him. He walked slowly back to his car and threw up by the rear fender when he got there.

CHAPTER 22

The first time I opened my eyes I felt a pull on my right arm, a sting and then passed out again. All I knew was that I seemed to be moving. Now looking around I am in what appears to be a hospital room, but a little bigger than usual. The walls are white and the bed is standard hospital issue. My left arm is in plaster and in my right hand is an IV. I am wearing a hospital gown and nothing else, which is a little worrying. I wonder who undressed me. I am surprised there is no one here. I hope Sam is on his way. I really miss him and could seriously do with a less than manly hug. I can't see a call bell anywhere.

Feeling around with my right had I take an inventory of the bandage on my head and the catheter in my bladder.

"Hello! Anyone there?" Might as well let the staff know I am awake.

The door opens and in walks a guy with short grey hair maybe in his 60's. White coat and stethoscope OK here's the doctor, he's not smiling, as he greets me, "Ah Mr Lyman glad you've decided to join us."

I'm about to respond when I see the guy coming in behind him. About my age, blond, steely eyes and unless they have a new way of taking a temperature the large gun he's holding would indicate he is not a nurse. I decide to keep my mouth shut for once. I am really confused.

"Are you in any pain?" The doctor seemed really natural.

"Ah no, no thank you. Where am I?" I didn't think I was in Kansas anymore and wanted to stay with it regardless of the pain in my head and arm.

"Never mind, you are here as a guest of Marco. He has left me strict instructions to make you medically comfortable until he gets here." He began to check the circulation in my fingers of my left hand, and then moved round to adjust the IV.

"Who is Marco?" I wasn't really expecting an answer and was surprised when he said.

"Marco is the leader of our little group. We have a common goal but Marco keeps it all together and on track. I have to say it is a bit unusual having a Cause here rather than an Infector, but I am sure he knows what he is doing. He'll be here tomorrow.

I understood the words but not the meaning. "What do you mean by Cause and Infector?"

"All in good time Mr Lyman. I'll leave that to Marco to explain. Until then you will be kept in the ward on an IV. I understand the special medical issues associated with your disability so I irrigated your colon and passed a urinary catheter while you were sedated. Don't bother to ask for food or drink."

He looked at me as if I should be thankful. "Masters here will make sure you don't try anything stupid, although in your condition I don't see what you could do." He laughed.

I was speechless and frightened. I swallowed and my hands shook as the man identified as Masters handcuffed my right wrist to the bedrail. It seemed like a futile move as I couldn't leave the room if the bed was on fire, but if it was to increase the fear it worked.

Both men left the room and closed the door. I was alone again.

CHAPTER 23

Ron Butterfield has questioned Sam and Donna over and over about their conversation with Josh. He was now waiting for a report from the rescue crew. Major Murdoch was due to call in five minutes. The tension in the Oval office was palpable. Ron was concerned about Sam Seaborn. Sitting on a couch, he appeared to be sinking further into himself as they waited for news. He didn't really understand single sex relationships but could see the genuine love that Josh and Sam felt for each other and intended to give Sam the respect he would any partner. He knew how he would feel if his wife was missing. The President, Leo, Toby, CJ and Donna all sat around the room. Mike Casper and Charlie stood to one side. No one spoke, all occasionally glancing at the phone.

When it eventually rang, with a nod from the President, Ron put it on speaker. "What have you got for us Major?"

"Sir, Carl Samuels has been evacuated and is now being flown to GW. His condition is stable but he is still unconscious. We have not found Mr Lyman, however have uncovered his backpack, cell phone, and overcoat. We have searched the surrounding area and have found signs of a group of people travelling through from the crash site. They appear to have left in two vehicles. We have tyre prints but once they hit the highway we have no real hope of tracking them."

"Is there anyway we can get a forensic team to the site?" Leo threw the question out to Ron and the Major.

Ron fielded it, "There's very little point. We have no way of knowing how many people have been on that plane recently and would never be able to eliminate all of them."

"Sir there is something else. Hang on. One of my team has just found a card. We're not sure what it means but it was where we believe Mr Lyman was."

"What do you mean a card?" The president sounded a little frustrated.

"Mr President it is a business card which has a logo on and has written on it The Dark and Guilty of causing death by perversion."

Everyone in the Oval office looked at one another, exchanging confused looks.

"Major are you saying The Dark is like a company name?"

"Yes Sir, a company or organisation."

"What is the logo?" Toby interjected, "Describe it please Major."

"It's two swords made into a cross. They're crossed in the middle like a positive." The Major tried to explain the visual.

Ron took over, "Major I need you to get to a scanner and get a copy of that here as soon as possible. You also need to get the original here via a lab to check for any forensics we can get for it."

"Yes Sir."

"Check back in an hour. Thanks Major" Ron disconnected the call.

"Ron, Mike have you heard of this organisation, The Dark?" Do you think they have Josh?" Leo asked what everyone was thinking.

"I haven't, Mike?" Ron turned to look at the younger man.

"No, but we'll get on to it immediately. I'll report back as soon as I have anything." Mike said as he hurried out of the room.

CHAPTER 24

"Causing death by perversion. That sounds like a charge for a crime." Toby mused.

"No crime I've ever heard of!" Sam shocked everyone by shouting. "Josh has been taken by a bunch of sick fucks. We have to DO something!"

"Sam we have to find out who they are so we have a chance of finding them and therefore Josh." Ron tried to rationalise. Sam was beyond rational.

"No one is doing anything. He's been gone for ages now. He could be dead." Sam collapsed into sobs and was escorted from the room by Donna and CJ.

"Take him to the Mural room and we'll get a doctor to see him." Leo instructed. "Charlie get a doctor he as quickly as you can. I think it might be easier on him if he's given something to take the edge off."

Charlie left the room as CJ came back in. "Donna is looking after him. What do we tell the press?"

"Nothing yet, let's see what they have."

"Leo they will know about the crash."

"CJ's right Leo." Toby agreed.

"Okay, confirm the crash, but we don't want to give details as Josh's Mum isn't here yet. We can stall them that way."

CJ and Toby nodded in agreement.

"When will Carl get to GW?" The President was trying to move the focus from Josh.

"In about and hour. His vitals are good, but he is still unconscious."

"Does Cindy know?"

"Yeah she is meeting him there. Donna was going to go as well to support her. Perhaps Charlie can stay with Sam." Leo thought out loud.

"Yeah I'll tell him." President Bartlet confirmed.

CHAPTER 25

Half an hour later Donna and Sam walked into the Oval office. Sam looked considerably calmer if not any happier.

"Sam you should be lying down." Leo approached the younger man.

"I'm really sorry about earlier, Mr President, Leo. I shouldn't have raised my voice. I'm feeling calmer now and would like to stay in here if that's ok."

"That's okay Sam, sit here with us. Donna are you going to GW?"

"Yes Sir. I'm going now. I'll call to let you know how Carl is."

"Okay thanks Donna." Leo said as she left the room.

Mike Casper appeared at the door and walked into the room.

"What have you got Mike?"

"Quite a lot actually." He walked towards Sam. "Has Josh ever mentioned a Marco Capelli?"

"No, why who is he?"

"He's the leader of an organisation called The Dark. We are still not quite sure of their agenda. They are a small group but deeply underground, however there are rumours of links with homophobic hate crime."

"Gay bashing?" CJ queried.

"Yes, but they are more sophisticated than taking someone into an alley and beating the shit out of them." Mike explained.

"Why do you think Josh knows this Marco?" Sam looked up at Mike.

"He lived in a town near Josh and his son was Josh's age."

"Was, he's dead?" Toby picked up on the tense.

"Yes he moved out to San Francisco aged 20, he later contracted HIV and died last year."

Leo moved closer, "What was his name?"

"The son? Joey, Joey Capelli. Why? Do you know him?"

Leo paused and looked at Sam, "No but Josh did." Now he had the attention of everyone in the room.

"Sam did Josh ever tell you the story of the weekend Mallory outed him?"

"Yeah. He said he came back from Harvard for the first time. It was his mother's birthday. You, Jenny and Mallory were staying for the dinner party on the next night. Mallory nagged Josh to get her a Harvard T-shirt. He was out and she went through his room and found a gay magazine. She showed it to Noah and Rachel." Sam managed a small smile thinking of the look on Josh's face as he told the story.

"Yeah, that's right she was trying to get Josh into trouble. She was 13 he was 18 and she had a big crush on him, but he had gone out with friends his first night back. She was pissed as hell." Leo remembered.

"What's that got to do with the Capelli's?" Toby enquired impatiently.

"Josh came home that night with torn clothes, bruised ribs, black eyes, and in fact he was black and blue all over. Noah was waiting for him to confront him over the magazine. Of course that went out the window once they saw what a state he was in. Noah left the magazine on the coffee table and Josh saw it while they were trying to clean him up. He admitted he was gay, apologised for not trusting them enough to tell them before. That was what was bothering his parents not him actually being gay. To be honest I think at that point they were just glad to get him back in one piece. He wouldn't tell them what had happened to him though." Leo paused.

"Capelli?" Mike guessed.

"So it turned out. The next day a young guy, around Josh's age came round asking for him. He was still in bed recovering from the beating he'd had the night before. Noah wouldn't let this guy see him. The boy said he was called Joey Capelli and he was really sorry what his father had done to Josh." Leo sighed and continued. "His dad was a violent man who had found Josh and Joey in Joey's bedroom. They weren't expecting him back. Joey knew he would be beaten senseless by his dad if he told him he was gay. Josh knew Joey's dad beat him, so he confessed to seducing Joey and forcing him to take part. Typical Josh, always trying to protect those around him. He got a beating but Joey was unharmed. Joey came to thank him and tell him he was leaving Connecticut. We never saw him again. Josh got better and went back to college and begged Noah not to do anything about it." Leo finished the story.

"I didn't know the whole story. He never told me." Sam filled the silence.

"So why would this guy be after him now, all these years later? It's not Josh's fault his son's dead" Ron sounded exasperated.

TBC

Please let me know what you think

"


	7. Chapter 7

Thanks for the reviews.

Acknowledgements are on first page

Warning there are references to anal sex in this chapter, nothing too graphic.

CHAPTER 26

"We have no way of tracking where they took Mr Lyman Sir. Not from the crash site." Major Murdoch's report was not what anyone wanted to hear.

"Can we ascertain the cause of the crash?" Leo asked for everyone assembled.

"On first inspection it looks like a small explosive device went off damaging some of the electrical systems. The pilot would not have been able to keep the plane in the air. Sir there really is nothing more we can do here tonight."

"Okay Major, get your team back, and thanks." Jed Bartlet sounded as dispirited as the rest of his staff looked.

"Thank you Sir." Leo disconnected the call at the Major's words.

"Any news from GW?" CJ was asked as she entered the room.

"Carl is still unconscious but stable. He has a severe concussion but is otherwise uninjured. They are sure he'll make a full recovery. Donna is staying down there and will continue to keep us updated" She informed the President and everyone else.

"Thank God." The President breathed. He looked towards the door as Mike Casper came in with Ron Butterfield behind him.

"What have we got?"

"We don't know where Josh is but we do know that the hold on the vote was a ploy to get him travelling by some non-commercial flight."

"Feldman was behind this?" Sam spoke directly to Mike with fire in his eyes.

"We don't think he was behind the actual attempt to kill Josh or the abduction; however we do believe he and others were being blackmailed to pretend to change their votes and insist that they would only deal with Josh." Mike explained.

"Have you spoken to him?" Leo voice and face betrayed the emotions he was feeling.

"Yes we have agents interviewing him now. He knows more but won't say anything else until he is promised immunity." Ron told the assembled Whitehouse staffers, but looked directly at The President.

"You are sure he wasn't in on more than the vote?" It was an important point as far as President Bartlet was concerned.

"We are sure Sir." Ron confirmed and Mike nodded.

"You can't be seriously considering this. He was involved in trying to kill Josh!" Toby was outraged but was staring intently at his deputy, who was silently looking at the floor.

"I understand, but we need find Josh and get the people who really tried to kill him. We need to do this quickly or who knows what might happen to Josh." Mike explained as Sam shuddered.

Leo and The President exchanged looks and nodded. "Okay give him immunity, but he will have to resign. We can't deal with this man on a daily basis knowing what he did."

"Yes Sir." Mike left the room.

"Sam when is Rachel getting in?" Leo stood in front him hand on his shoulder.

"Uh! Ahm 10 am. Yeah 10 this morning." Sam looked up with red eyes.

"We'll get someone to meet her and bring her straight here." Sam nodded at Leo's words and looked back down.

"Charlie has organised some food and blankets etc for you all in the Mural room. We need to get some rest while we wait for news. I want you all to go in there and try to eat something at least." The President left no room for discussion and they all filed out of the Oval office towards the Mural room.

CHAPTER 27

I feel like I've been in this room for days. It can only have been a couple of hours. My head and arm hurt like crazy. Maybe I should have told that doctor guy and got some drugs. I don't understand what these guys want with me. I'm a Cause not an Infector, but I don't know what that means. Caused what? Marco seems to be important. I can't remember ever knowing anyone called Marco. I really am confused. I need more information and Donna to put it on note cards for me! No I wouldn't want Donna to be here, in danger. Stupid thought. Carl's dead. Carl's dead, because of me. How come I keep surviving and people around me die? It's not fair. Joanie and Carl are both dead and here I am alive, if not kicking. I got shot and survived when many don't. The year my car slid off the road on the ice, 50 people died that winter in car accidents. I looked it up. Maybe this is it, karma, or my comeuppance as my mom would say.

Here comes the doctor with the armed Nurse Ratchet.

"Mr Lyman I'm just going to add something to your IV." The doctor was drawing up a clear liquid from a glass ampoule into a syringe.

"W -what is it?" Great now I'm so scared I'm stuttering.

"Something to keep you awake." He explained as he added it to the small bag of saline already up.

"W-why do I have to stay awake?" The tremor in my voice was there for all to hear. Nurse Ratchet actually smiled.

"Marco wants you to know why you are here before he arrives. You are going to watch a film he made. It is more effective if you are able to watch it multiple times on a loop, without sleeping."

I felt my heart rate surge as he sped up the IV and the drug hit my system. I began to sweat and shake slightly.

"Looks like it is working." He adjusted the rate again before leaving the room.

I watched Nurse Ratchet aim a remote control at a digital projector on the ceiling. He smirked at me and turned off the lights before leaving the room.

My heart was still thumping in my chest but at least it slowed down a little. I took deep breaths to try and calm myself and combat the fear and nausea, as well as the effects of the 'speed' that was now coursing through my veins.

The entire wall in front on me had been converted into a screen. There was sound coming from unseen speakers around the room. Loud and grating like canned laughter it put me even more on edge.

The projection was a collection of home videos and photos featuring a child. He looked to be possibly of Italian descent. He was playing by the sea, sitting on a man's lap (his father?), blowing out candles on a cake, and later riding a bike. There was something familiar about him but I couldn't place him. The presentation went on as the child got older. Then I saw it. He turned as a teenage to smile in to the camera. That smile had made me go weak at the knees all those year ago. "Joey Capelli!"

CHAPTER 28

The memories came flooding back. We met at a baseball game. He was a friend of a friend of a friend. We had all gone to a party afterwards and we ended up talking to each other nearly all night. I was 17 he had just turned 18. We kissed that night and after that saw each other as often as we could. We made out in the backs of our cars as neither of us had come out to our folks, in Joey's case his dad as his mom died when he was little. It was heavy petting with blow jobs and quite innocent exploration. I was going to Harvard soon; he worked in his dad's restaurant. He wanted to go to college but his dad wouldn't hear of it. His dad was a nasty piece of work. He would beat him for no real reason. Joey often had bruises on his body and even burns a couple of times. He was brutal; I can still feel the pain as he beat the shit out of me when he found us in Joey's room.

I was down from Harvard for the weekend. We thought his dad was away overnight. We had decided to take our relationship a stage further. We were very good friends and to some extent I suppose safe fuck buddies. Neither of us had ever had anal sex before but both wanted to try. We figured we were safe to experiment with each other. We knew we wouldn't laugh at the other man if he did or said something stupid. I also wanted to seem more experienced in case I met a guy I liked at college. I always believed everyone else was more sexually advanced than me. So we got lube and condoms and read up what to do and thought we had the privacy and time to give it a go. Joey went first topping me. It was scary and exhilarating and such a turn on. I had never been so hard in my then short life. Once we had rested a bit, not long at that age. We switched over and I topped. The entire experience top and bottom was amazing and something I have repeated as often as I can in later years; especially with Sam who, like me, likes to top or bottom depending on our mood. I should say liked as due to the obvious I am no longer fully functioning in that department, but I remember all those times fondly and anyway I can still take the lead we just have to be a little more inventive nowadays. God I miss Sam.

Joey as a teenager in front of me brings me back from my Sam moment. His dad went nuts when he found us. He opened Joey's door without knocking as usual. Joey was not allowed respect or privacy. I had just come out of Joey and he was lying on the bed ass in the air, big grin on his face. I was getting off him with a matching big grin on my face. Then the door opens.

Mr Capelli dragged Joey off the bed and went to hit him. I jumped in between them and before I could think about it basically told him I had all but raped his son. He grabbed me, slung me against the wall and just kept hitting me. Eventually Joey pulled him off me and said he didn't want his dad to go to jail and begged him to stop before he killed me. I was bundled with my clothes to my car and went home after being threatened to never come near his son again.

I smiled to myself thinking about Mallory and that stunt she pulled. What a terrible weekend that was. I never saw Joey again. Dad said he had come round to apologise. I guess he still works in his dad's restaurant. Marco's! CJ is right I am an idiot boy. Marco Capelli. Fuck! Why now though it was years ago? Surely it's not worth killing me over. Even if he does think I forced myself on his son. I sit back heart thumping as the images of Joey play over and over in front of me. I can't stop shaking and I don't know if it is the drugs or fear.

TBC

Another 2 chapters of this story to go.


	8. Chapter 8

Thanks for the reviews.

Acknowledgements are on first page

Hope you enjoy.

CHAPTER 29

It was 8am and Josh had been missing for over 10 hours. Sam didn't think he could hold it together much longer. He had not been able to sleep and only ate some soup when Dr Bartlet literally stood over him. Not that anybody had slept much but everyone else had dozed for a while. He felt empty inside and clutched his cell phone as if it were a lifeline to Josh. Rationally he knew Josh no longer possessed his own phone, still his was a number Josh knew off by heart. Despite being able to interpret polling data and often simultaneously do electoral math in his head, Josh wasn't good at remembering phone numbers. He relied on Donna to store them in his rolodex and even sometimes in his own cell phone. Sam managed to smile a little at the thought of his amazing, intelligent, and sexy partner who struggled over something so basic. It was incredibly endearing. The smile soon faded as he tried to contemplate what life would be like without Josh. There would be no life. He had nearly lost him before; even so Sam felt that this time was the worst. When Josh was shot Sam was distraught but he had faith in the medical professionals trying to save his life. Josh still occasionally struggled with the PTSD, given the right triggers if he was tired and stressed he got flashbacks, although he was able to handle them better now, Sam was often the only one to notice his reactions. The car crash had life altering affects, but Sam knew he and Josh together would get through it. This was different. He was in the hands of evil and Sam could only hope they would find him soon and that evil's plans would be delayed.

Battling with the fear for dominance within Sam was guilt. He had given Josh's travel plans to Feldman. HE had given him what he needed to get Josh killed. Feldman had played him. If Josh died it would be HIS fault. Sam could take no more he crumpled to the floor on his knees, hugging himself he sobbed his heart out. Toby and Charlie semi lifted him from the floor to a couch in the Mural room. Sam was vaguely aware of Dr Bartlet's presence, a sting and then oblivion.

CHAPTER 30

"We'll need to keep an eye on him. This will make him sleep for a couple of hours. Hopefully he'll be calmer when he wakes. His exhaustion is magnifying his reactions, which is understandable. I can't imagine what he must be going through." Dr Bartlet spoke to Toby, Charlie, CJ and Leo who were in the Mural room. She had sent The President to sleep for a couple of hours in the residence at about 6, with a promise to wake him if there was any news.

"Sam won't thank us if he's out of it and something happens." Toby mused looking at the sleeping figure.

"I'll take all the blame, Toby, don't worry." Dr Bartlet attempted to reassure the Communications Director.

Mike Casper entered the room and stood for a minute taking in the dishevelled group before him. Leo stepped forward as Charlie left the room to wake The President, "What have you got Mike?"

"We now know that Senator Feldman was approached by someone who knew what he and his friends were up to. He suspected that one of the group had sold them out and subsequently discovered he was correct."

"Who sold them out?"

"Senator Patrick Coleman."

"Somehow that doesn't surprise me." Leo nodded.

"He has always been a real piece of work." Toby agreed.

"So what do we do now?" They all turned as Jed Bartlet entered the room.

Well Sir, we believe Coleman has a meeting to collect his payoff today at 4pm." Mike explained.

"Do we know where?" CJ voiced the question on everyone's lips.

"No, however we now have him under surveillance and will be there when he has his meeting."

"Are you going to detain whoever he's meeting?"

"Probably not; if we want to find Josh this is probably our best bet. We will follow Coleman's contact but detain and question the Senator after they meet, once he has his money." Mike waited for his words to sink in.

"So we can't do anything until then?" Toby sounded disbelieving.

"Toby there is no point shaking Coleman down now. It is very unlikely he knows where Josh is. He's not on the inside he's just a flunky. Of course in the meantime we are continuing to search for where they're holding Josh. " Mike held Toby's gaze.

President Bartlet expelled his breath and took his wife's hand as if drawing strength from her. "Okay that sounds like the best plan for now. Don't you dare lose Coleman Mike, as you said he's our best chance of finding Josh." Looking down at Sam he continued, "We have to find him Mike."

"Yeah, I know Sir." Mike sighed and left the room.

In the next 3 hours staffers went about their business. Toby, Leo, CJ & Charlie showered and changed. Sam slept under Dr Bartlet's watchful eye. When he woke Sam looked around the mural room disorientated. A voice near him asked, "How are you doing?"

He turned and saw Rachel Lyman sitting near him. He stood up, steadied himself, and drew her to her feet. They clung to one another as two people who understood the pain of the other. Once apart Rachel studied Sam."You look like hell Sam my boy."

"Yeah, at least I look like I feel." He smiled but it didn't reach his eyes.

"He's strong my Joshua, he'll get through this. He has to get through this. I'm not ready to lose him. I can't lose another child." Sam could hear the catch in Rachel's voice as she spoke.

Charlie opened the door and invited them to join the others in the Oval office. He updated Sam and Josh's mom about Senator Coleman on the way.

CHAPTER 31

"You are a very lucky man Lyman. You really should be dead, but you just don't seem to be able to get the message. Perhaps you are as stupid as you look." With great difficulty I tore my eyes away from the images that were playing over and over in front of me for…how long? Minutes, hours, days, I didn't know I had lost all track of time. I tried to focus on the man who had spoken. Stocky but all muscle, about my mom's age maybe. Marco, Joey's dad moved and turned on the lights. Their brightness triggered a burning sensation in my tired eyes, boy I wish he hadn't done that. I didn't know what to say or even if I could speak. I wish my heart would stop pounding in my chest and that I could keep my hands still.

"What no smart come back. I hear you're usually full of it, can't stop mouthing off." He was now standing right next to me, his face merely inches from mine.

"I…I don't know what you want me to say." I stumbled stupidly.

"I don't want anything from you, except suffering. Your suffering, that is." His breath on my face was hot and smelled of cigars. I tried to move away but he reached over and gripped my face forcing me to look at him.

"W...why? I..I don't understand. Is Joey here, could I speak to him?" The speed with which he let go of my face and punched me in it was astounding. The pain made me catch my breath. I could feel something wet running down my face and I tasted blood.

"You fucking pervert. Don't you dare speak his name!" Marco yelled straight at me still just as close.

I really don't understand what's going on. I don't think I've ever been so scared in my entire life, even when the house caught fire I don't think I was as frightened.

Marco moved away from me and began to talk, looking at the images of his son. "He was a lovely innocent boy, trusting, easily led. He was all I had after his mother was gone. As he got older he started getting ideas from some of the kids he was mixing with. Kids like you, your kind. He kept on about going to college. I got that out of his system. We had a business, a good one. We had money, not rich like you but plenty. Mixing with you and your kind he thought he wasn't good enough. I knocked some sense in to him and everything went back to normal. He worked in our restaurant, went out drinking with his local buddies. He got plenty of attention from girls but Joey never gave in to any of them. He told me he was saving himself for the one he would marry."

The look he directed at me when he finally turned to face me was one of unadulterated hatred. I shrank back at the intensity of it. "Then you had to come in to his life again with your perverted college ideas. You make me sick!" His spittle was warm as it hit my forehead and as it slipped down my face to join the blood already there.

I was too shocked to speak. This was a twisted version of Joey's life. Joey desperately wanted to go to college. He was bright enough, but his dad beat him when he asked about it. We may have lived in Westport but Marco had just as much money as we did. My dad did lots of pro-bono work and although we were very comfortable we were not really rich. Not like Sam's family. I wasn't sure whether 'my kind' was Jews, Ivy League types or gays. Possibly he meant all three. This was a father in denial and full of hatred. The pain in my face was vying with my head and arm. I really didn't want push him, so I again remained silent.

"Why did you do it? Why did you do that to my Joey? You ruined him. He thought that was what he was, a fucking faggot. YOU made him that way." His breath was back in my face, his finger in my chest. I wanted to back away but I had no where to go.

"I didn't." Was that really my voice, so quiet and unsure? "He…we were friends…l..lovers. We were just kids, experimenting." Oh my god! I think my head has just exploded. There are dancing lights in front of my eyes. I have never been hit so hard in my entire life. How can my head still be attached to my neck after being knocked sideways like that? I can't lift it back up. Okay I'll just leave it where it is for the moment.

"YOU BASTARD! DON'T YOU DARE BLAME HIM. He was a good boy. After you had your way with him he went to San Francisco. Did you know that? He went with men. He got fucking AIDS. He's dead and YOU caused it!" I couldn't see Marco properly as my head was still reeling from the blow he had delivered, but I could hear the catch in his voice. My addled brain tried to make sense of what he had said, but I was wired from the drugs and lack of sleep and in such unbelievable pain. I can't think anymore.

"Do you want to kill him now?"

"No I have something special planned for this one."

"I know but if we don't stop the meds for a while he could have a heart attack."

"So how long will we need to stop for before the next phase?"

"About 2 hours should do it."

"Okay stop the IV and let's get him into the AV treatment room so he's ready."

I think I recognised the doctor's voice talking with Marco. I felt hands on me and the IV was removed but the cannula was left in. The handcuff was undone. I felt rough hands grab me under my arms and I was lifted and put down none too gently in a wheelchair. A strap was done up tightly round my waist, my head lolled to one side. I still couldn't hold it up. My vision was clearing and the dancing lights were dissipating. I can't say the same for the pain.

CHAPTER 32

"Are you sure we have enough people on Coleman?" Sam looked directly at Ron Butterfield.

"Mike and I believe so, Sam. You have to trust us."

"Can I see Feldman?"

"No Sam, I don't think that's a good idea."

Sam sat down, obviously frustrated. Rachel Lyman squeezed his shoulder.

"Sam you have to let them do their job."

Rubbing a hand over his face, Sam sighed, "Yeah you're right. I know. I'm sorry Ron."

"That's okay Sam. I understand."

"Sam we'll get him back." President Bartlet tried to reassure the younger man.

"I hope so Sir. I really hope so."

"So there is nothing any of us can do unless they find Josh before 4 'o' clock." Leo paused to take in the occupants of the room. "So I suggest you all go back to your offices and try to concentrate on some work. We still have a country to run. Rachel, Abbey has invited you to the Residence. Is that okay?"

"Yes Leo that will be fine."

"Charlie please show Mrs Lyman to the Residence. The First Lady is waiting there."

After Charlie and Mrs Lyman had left the room, Leo looked again at those assembled. "Look I know this is hard, but we have to wait until we can actually do something."

"You want us to just carry on as normal?" Sam asked is disbelief.

"Sam I want you to try to focus on something else for a while."

"Something else! Something else! How do you propose I do that? It's Josh! MY Josh!" Sam stood as his voice got louder.

"Sam!" Toby approached Sam and took him by the arm, but Sam shrugged him off, still glaring at Leo.

Then Leo's composure finally broke, "Do you think I don't feel anything? I've known Josh since he was born! He's like a son to me! I brought him here. It's my fault, all of it. Him getting shot, the PTSD, even the car accident was an errand I sent him on. I don't know how I will ever face Rachel if he doesn't get through this. Noah was a good friend, he trusted me with his son, his precious sole surviving child. I let him down." Leo dropped into a chair, exhausted.

Everyone stared at each other; too stunned to speak they had never seen Leo lose it like that. No one had any idea how responsible Leo felt for Josh. They all knew he loved him like a son, but to blame himself like this.

Jed Bartlet recovered first, kneeling in front of his best friend he took his hands, "Leo you didn't do this. You didn't do any of it. It's not your fault. Josh would never blame you, neither would Noah or Rachel. They were proud that you brought Josh on board. Please Leo you need to let this go. We need you now. He needs you now."

Leo took in a huge shuddering breath, and slowly released it. Looking at Jed he smiled. "Are you going to be able to get up from there, Sir?"

Chuckling gently The President pushed on Leo's knees to stand, "I'm not that old my friend."

Standing himself Leo made eye contact with each of the silent Senior Staffers. "I'm sorry, guess I'm more tired than I thought."

"It's fine Leo." Everyone murmured at once.

"Sam, I do understand. I just know that we have a long 24 hours ahead of us and sitting in here brooding isn't helping anyone." Leo explained.

"I'm sorry for raising my voice, Sir, Leo. I'll go and do some work with Toby."

"Okay now all of you get out for now and we'll reconvene at four, unless there is news before then." They were dismissed by the President.

"Thank you Sir." "Thank you Sir."

"Thank you Mr President."

CHAPTER 33

Sam, Toby and CJ all went down to the mess to get some coffee. Sitting at the table they sipped their drinks and played with the muffins CJ insisted they needed as comfort food.

"We need to decide what to say at the briefing." CJ looked at her colleagues.

"What do you think they've got CJ?" Sam didn't look up from the table.

"I don't know. They must know that Josh isn't back in DC. They would assume he'd be brought to GW if he was injured."

"We could just see what they ask." Toby's suggestion got raised eyebrows from both Sam and CJ.

"They'll know about Carl." Sam offered, "We have to tell them something about Josh."

"Ron says we cannot confirm he was abducted at this stage. It might scare off the person meeting Coleman." Toby confirmed what they already knew.

"Okay so we confirm he was injured and say he is being stabilised before being transported to GW?" CJ queried.

"Yeah we have to be vague. There's no other option." Toby agreed and Sam nodded.

"Okay I'll see you guys later." Quickly squeezing Sam's shoulder CJ left them to go and prepare.

"Sam come to my office and we'll look at the education part of the speech."

"Okay." Sam sighed and followed Toby.

CHAPTER 33

I think my face is twice its normal size. The guy with the drill-hammer in my head must be on steroids to keep that speed up. I must have slept. I'm so thirsty; my mouth could give the Sahara a run for its money. Luckily I'm in too much pain to feel hungry. I'm in a different room, rectangular and smaller but still with smooth white walls. I'm sitting in a recliner chair with its back against one of the narrower walls, so I get a good view of the room. The door is actually open! I would laugh if it didn't hurt so much. I am so pathetic that my captors can leave the door open. With my left arm incapacitated I can't even drag myself to the door let alone out of it.

Okay inventory time; the cannula is still in my right arm, still wearing a hospital gown and, yes still have a catheter. Plaster on my left arm feels tight and uncomfortable, fingers are a little cold. Feeling my head there is still a bandage there, my nose feels huge, and my left cheek is very sore. On the positive side I can hold my head up. Looking up, not a good idea as more pain rips through my head and neck, I see another projector on the ceiling.

"Hope you had a nice sleep as it's the last one you're going to get. That is until the ultimate one of course." Marco was followed by the doctor. I didn't like the idea of the ultimate sleep, sounded a tad final. I wonder where Nurse Ratched got to; at least he was pretty to look at.

Without another word Marco grabbed my right arm and attached it to the wall with a metal ring that was hanging there. The doctor pulled down some clear tubing from hole in the wall. He hooked it up to the cannula in my arm. I tried to pull away but my arm was being held by the restraint and Marco's strong hands.

"Hey what are you doing?" I demanded. No response.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I tried again. It's amazing how a little bit of sleep can give you a bit more fight, or possibly less sense.

The hands swiftly moved from my arm to my throat. Marco's hot breath was on my face. "Shut the fuck up, or I'll dig those fucking dimples out of your face with my pocket knife. Nod if you understand." I nodded, Sam likes my dimples and I don't like pain.

"Ready to go, I just need to start the IV from next door." The doctor told Marco, who nodded.

"Okay start it now while I get the room set up." I watched the doctor leave the room and then focussed on Marco.

He looked at me and smiled. "You're going to watch another movie, but sorry we don't do popcorn. See I know all about you, everything. I know your entire history. I know what happened to your sister and your dad. I know where your mom lives."

"Please...no...don't hurt my mom." My voice was barely a whisper as tears gathered in my eyes.

Laughing at me, "Aww that's so sweet, little boy doesn't want his mommy hurt. I won't hurt her. You've already done that. Fucking faggot, she must be so ashamed of you."

I looked away trying to control the tears that threatened to fall. Taking a deep breath I looked back at Marco, I didn't want to appear even weaker in front of him.

"When I said your entire history I also meant your medical history and of course that would include meetings with ATVA." The shock I felt must have shown on my face. "Yes Lyman I know you're a fucking nut job. PTSD they call it. Can't stand sirens I hear." The smile got wider.

"I was only ever going to kill you, like we do with your kind. We normally bring the Infectors here and let them die a painful death watching home movies of those they've killed." He paused looking at me closely.

My heart was thumping in my chest again and I was sweating and had begun to shake a little "Guess the good doctor's cocktail is taking affect."

"So this is what's going to happen. You are so pathetic already there is only one thing I can take from you before you die. Your sanity, well what little of it you have left."

I was trying desperately to focus on what he was saying. My sanity before I die. Oh my god what was he going to do?

"Taking a remote from his pocket he pointed it at the projector and turned down to lights so the room was very dim.

"Enjoy," he said before leaving the room closing the white door behind him. I saw his face look through the small window in the door before he closed the blind across it.

The sudden sound of sirens startled me. It was all around me coming from the very walls themselves. Then the images came, some in my head, some on the walls. I couldn't escape the audio-visual onslaught and the drugs coursing through my veins heightened my senses leaving me feeling totally raw. Playing all round me a special montage designed to elicit a specific response, the loss of my rational self.

TBC

What do you think?


	9. Chapter 9

Thanks for the reviews.

Acknowledgements are on first page

This was going to be the last instalment, however it will be far too long and ten is a nice round number. So this is the penultimate one.

CHAPTER 35 (sorry there were two chapter 33's last time!)

The time dragged for those in the Whitehouse waiting for something to happen. Hoping and praying for good news. Josh was well liked despite his tendency to speak before engaging his brain. Most people who worked closely with him had experienced his sensitive caring side. Often seemingly small gestures showed how much he loved those around him. Antique books and non-anniversary flowers, a father and son reunited, unquestioning support for a lapsed alcoholic, loyalty to a sick man, a goldfish named Gail, an introduction over chilli, a dimpled smile and a lover's touch.

People went about their business amid the tense atmosphere. Only the Senior Staff and their Senior Assistants were privy to the details, however everyone knew Carl was at GW and something had happened to Josh. Even if they didn't know much the tension amongst the Senior Staff was palpable, and there was a rumour circulating that a lady, believed to be Josh's mom, was in the residence. As 4 o'clock approached Leo, Sam, Toby, CJ, Charlie, Donna, Rachel Lyman, Abigail and Jed Bartlet assembled in the Oval. Soon they were joined by Ron Butterfield.

"Donna, how's Carl?"

"He's conscious now Sir. He doesn't remember anything after boarding the plane. He's going to be fine, should be home in a couple of days. His mom's here now looking after the baby so Cindy can stay with him." Although Donna addressed her answer to the President, she couldn't help but glance over to Ron as he came in attempting to read the expression on his face.

"Ron."

"Sir, everything is in place. I will be getting live updates from Mike who is with the team following Coleman." The President nodded in response.

The room's occupants waited in silence as Ron listened to his earpiece.

"He's at The Marriott in the bar. He's sitting with a blond man, I.D. as yet unknown." Ron paused as he listened again, "Coleman has accepted an envelope and is leaving. The blond man is staying and has ordered another drink." Ron concentrated for a while then looked up at the faces staring intently at him. "They have Coleman and there are two teams on our unsub."

"When will we know something?" Sam couldn't sit still anymore and began to pace the crowded room.

"Mike will give us an update every half an hour. He is going to question Coleman personally." Ron informed them.

"Charlie perhaps you could organise some coffee for everyone please." Leo asked the young man.

"Yes Leo, I'll get on to it." Charlie looked relieved to have something to do as he left the room.

CHAPTER 36

The next two hours went by without much happening. The blond man, who was identified as Simon Masters had remained at the bar. It had been confirmed, he was staying at the hotel. So they wouldn't be able to follow him until he left the next day. Mike was still getting information from Coleman who had been reluctant to talk but a deal had been struck.

At 7 o'clock Mike entered the Oval and was greeted by expectant faces.

"Mike what have you got?" The President wasted no time in getting down to it.

"Okay firstly Simon Masters is part of the group known as The Dark. He's mainly used as muscle. He's also a weapons and explosives expert, trained in the marines. He became involved with them when his younger brother was diagnosed with AIDS. We know he is staying at the Marriott tonight and has a 6 am flight to Phoenix. We know that's where he flew to DC from. He left his car at the airport which agents in Phoenix have already located and fitted with a tracking device. They are also keeping it under visual surveillance just in case. We are counting on him to lead us to Josh."

"Another night, we have to wait another night?" It was the first time Rachel Lyman had spoken for sometime. Her voice reflected the anguish expressed on her face. Sam tightened the arm he already had around her shoulders pulling her closer to him.

"I'm sorry Ma'am but Masters is our only real lead. We haven't been able to locate Marco Capelli. We think he must be with Josh." Mike swallowed, "I really wish I could give you some better news."

Rachel looked up at Mike, "I know Mike. I'm sorry. I know he's your friend this must be difficult for you as well."

"I have to admit at this moment I would give almost anything to see that smug Lyman grin." Mike's smile was infectious as everyone was momentarily lost in images of a smug swaggering Josh Lyman.

"What do we know about this group 'The Dark'?" The President drew everyone out of their reverie.

Mike looked nervously at Rachel, unsure how much to say in front of her. She noticed, "Just let us have it Mike. It can't be worse than anything I have imagined." Rachel sat up straighter in her resolve.

Helping himself to coffee Mike stopped to gather his thoughts. "We don't know as much as we would like to, we got some information from Coleman," he admitted. "We know that they are a small but determined organisation whose members appear to have one thing in common. They have lost a loved one to AIDS. They believe that homosexuality is un-natural. They work on the premise that their family members cannot be gay because they know how they were brought up. Therefore they must have been corrupted in some way. So they tend to blame the first person known to have had sex with their son, brother or nephew."

"That's bullshit!" Sam exploded.

"Of course it is but these people are no where close to rational." Toby tried to calm his deputy.

"Mike, so they think anyone else is perverted, as what a result of their upbringing?" Sam ignored Toby and looked directly at Mike.

"In a manner of speaking yes that is what they believe. As far as Marco is concerned he brought up a straight normal son. Josh would be seen as the perverted one because either his upbringing is unknown or he comes from a wealthy Ivy League background. Marco sees privilege as a breeding ground for deviants. Coleman's words not mine by the way." Mike held his hand up to ward off the fire he saw in Sam's eyes.

"This is unbelievable. It's like being in the Twilight Zone. What do they do to these so called 'deviants'? " Leo asked quietly his reluctance to hear the answer evident in his voice.

Taking a deep breath Mike surveyed the room. The set of his face showed his resolve to continue. "They refer to them as a 'Cause', implying that they caused the person's subsequent behaviour. In Joey's case this would mean they believe Josh caused him to go to San Francisco and have relationships with men. Basically Josh perverted him. " Mike paused to let that sink in. "They then have people they refer to as 'Infectors'. These are the men they believe passed on HIV to their loved ones."

Leo looked at Mike, "You didn't answer my question Mike."

"They kill them Leo. They always kill them." The stunned silence that followed was broken by the sound of a ringing cell phone."

Mike opened his phone with a shaking hand, "Yeah Casper."

"Where?" Mike listened.

"Okay, thanks. Keep me informed." Mike ended the call. "We think we have a sighting of Marco Capelli just outside Phoenix."

"Are they following him?" CJ demanded.

"They are following it up. He was seen at a gas station an hour ago. We took the risk of agents making enquiries in and around Phoenix. Once we got a picture of Capelli from the DMV. We will move resources now, concentrate our search."

"Mike, if they always kill the Cause. Why do you think they took Josh? Why not just kill him when the crash didn't? That's got to be a positive thing that they didn't, hasn't it?" Donna wrung her hands as she asked the series of questions.

"Honestly I don't know. They have a place they take the 'Infectors', we think this is where they have Josh." Mike explained.

"What do they do with the 'Infectors?" Donna needed to get all the information in her head even if it was difficult. Mike paused before answering.

"According to Coleman they get someone, to be honest by the time they know their son etc is HIV positive the real Infector is possibly dead. They take the person to this place and withhold all medication. They spend their last days or weeks in pain surrounded by images of the person they may have infected. Coleman says he thinks they have a doctor there. He's never been there and has no idea where it is. So I don't know how accurate his information is."

After two more hours of inactivity Mike's cell rang.

"Casper." Mike listened.

"When?"

"How many?"

"I'll get on a plane as soon as I can. I want to be there." Mike ended the call.

"Mike?" Sam stood and walked towards the agent.

"They've found Capelli. He was seen going into a compound on the outskirts of Phoenix not far from the gas station. They're watching the compound." Turning to the President, "Sir they'll need your say so to go in."

"Can we wait for you to get there?" The President queried.

"I don't think we should Sir, but we should wait a little while to see what Intel we can get. It might be safer to get heat traces done so we can see how many people there are and where they are located. If I start to head down there now I might get there before they are ready." Sam grabbed Mike's arm. "Please let me come with you."

Mike shook his head, "Sam I understand, I do, but I'm not sure that's a good idea."

"Please Mike, Sir. I promise I'll do as I'm told I won't get in the way. I need to do something. Please." Sam begged Mike and President Bartlet.

"Take him with you Mike. When they have a plan let me know and I'll give the go." "Thank you Sir." They both said as they hurried from the room, Rachel and Sam exchanged smiles as he passed her. She understood his need to be there. She would rather remain, not sure how she would cope it they found Josh dead.

CHAPTER 37

"Here I got you your cigarettes from the gas station." Marco handed the pack to the doctor.

"Thanks. Masters called. He'll be back in the morning. Coleman's been paid off but Masters said he was asking lots of questions. He doesn't trust him."

"He doesn't know anything though so he's no threat. He just likes being the big man about town that's all, a stuffed shirt."

"We have another assignment, so once Lyman is done we will be going to California few a few days."

"Warmth, nice." The doctor closed his eyes to indicate bliss.

"Have you checked on our guest?" Marco brought him back to reality.

"Oh yeah, he's so far gone I think suicide will be a merciful release from his mental torture. Leave him a bit longer and tomorrow morning we will give him the opportunity to end it all." The doctor smiled at the thought.

"Good. I'm going to get some rest. You should to. I've set the alarms everything is secure." Marco wandered off in the direction of the rest area where there were cots. He changed direction and headed for the AV room. Pulling the blind aside he looked through into the dimly lit room. He could just see the figure in the chair. Face showing pain both physical and psychological, but the eyes, despite the tear tracks they were more distant than Marco had ever seen on someone who was alive. "Ladies and gentleman Josh Lyman has left the building." He said quietly to himself as he closed the blind. He headed back to the rest area and lay down on one of the cots.

The pressure on his chest felt like a knee which would fit in with the feeling of his face being slapped. "Come on Capelli rise and shine."

Marco opened his eyes and tried to push the man off him and reach his weapon. "Looking for this?" The man on top smiled and held up a knife.

He was dragged up, handcuffed and pushed towards the door. Here he was handed to two men who roughly pushed him into a cage in a van. In the next cage he could hear the doctor saying, "Oh my god" over and over.

"Come on Sam the area's secured and they found him. He's alive but in a bad way." Mike told Sam as they sat in the SUV awaiting news. The entry had been easy in the end. There were only two people inside and one of them had gone out for a cigarette turning off the security alarms. The other man was found sound asleep probably assuming that the alarms would wake him if the perimeter was breached.

Sam and Mike hurried into the building, following the EMT's that had been called to see to Josh. Sam stopped suddenly as he caught sight of Josh. "Josh," he breathed shocked by his lover's appearance. Collecting himself he ran to him. "Josh I'm here. I'm here baby, can you hear me?"

"Sir we really need to get to him." Sam didn't realise he had pushed past the EMT's in his haste to get to Josh. "Sorry." He said stepping away to give them room to work.

"Josh can you hear me? Josh I'm an Emergency Medical Technician we're here to help you."

"He's on something coming through the IV. Can someone get the bag from next door so they can test it to see what he's being given?" Mike responded and sent a man to do their bidding.

"Tachycardia 140, thready."

"BP 90 over 50."

"Respiration 34, shallow."

"Can we get his arm off the wall?" Mike nodded to another man who proceeded to undo the ring and release Josh's hand.

"There's reduced peripheral circulation on the left. Plaster's too tight."

Sam watched as they checked an unresponsive Josh over, gradually becoming aware that there were images playing on the walls. The lights were on in the room so they weren't obvious at first. Then he heard the sounds, sirens, gunshots, and voices. He looked at Josh and saw for the first time the vacant expression in his eyes. He didn't know where Josh was but he wasn't here with his body. "Mike the walls, look."

Mike looked. "Get whatever is being played here we'll need to analyse it." He instructed. Mike had noticed Josh's vacant eyes as well. "PTSD?" He queried with Sam.

"Worst I've ever seen him. What the hell have they done to him?" Sam sighed blinking away the tears that threatened to fall.

"You're his partner?" The EMT addressed Sam pulling him back to the moment.

"Yes, Sam Seaborn."

"What can you tell us about his medical history?"

"He was shot in the chest. He had a collapsed left lung and they had to repair his pulmonary artery. He has to watch his blood pressure and still gets stiffness in his right arm. He has to be careful if he gets the flu because of his heart and lungs. He had a car accident and is paralysed from the waist down." Sam knew he was babbling but hoped he got everything out. "He has PTSD." He added more quietly.

The EMT nodded. "Wow he's been busy. Thanks that was very helpful. Does he take any medication?"

"Yeah he takes Aspirin, Captopril, and Ativan if he needs it."

"Thanks." The EMT turned his attention back to Josh.

The EMT's huddled together discussing something. "What's wrong?" Mike asked.

"He's really dehydrated and the plan is to get him to DC. We're not happy to use the IV site they put in here as we don't know what's being going through it. His left arm is not an option neither is his head. It's not recommended for paraplegics to have IV's in their feet or legs. We don't do central lines, so I would suggest we get a doctor here ASAP to get some fluids into him centrally, lower his heart rate and see to his left arm.

"I'm on it." Mike spoke in to his radio, then listened. "Ten minutes."

The EMT nodded in response.

Sam's cell vibrated in his pocket. He answered it, "Sam Seaborn."

"No he's still here Sir. We're waiting for a doctor to stabilise him and put a central line in. Then he can be taken straight to GW."

Sam smiled a little as Dr Bartlet came on the speaker phone.

"No Ma'am they've been giving him some drugs and don't want to use that line, his left arm is broken. He has bandage on his head and looks like he's been punched in the face a few times."

"No he's not saying anything."

"Yes he is conscious, but …he's not quite here. They, they had some film playing. I didn't see it all but some of it was Rosslyn. There were sirens and gunshots. He didn't even respond to me."

"Yes Rachel, but this is a really bad episode. He seems almost catatonic." Sam couldn't stop the catch in his voice as he looked at the unusually still Josh Lyman and spoke to his mother on the phone.

"We'll be back in three hours Mike said. So I'll see you all at GW." Sam couldn't wait to get off the phone.

"I will thank you Sir." Sam closed his phone.

"Doc's here." Mike said as he led a man into the room.

CHAPTER 38

The flight to DC was uneventful. Josh remained unresponsive but stable. Sam tried several times to get a flicker of recognition from the man he shared his life with. Nothing and eventually Sam sighed and gave up content in holding Josh's right hand.

The transfer to GW was by helicopter which landed on the roof of the hospital. Sam followed closely by the gurney as it left the elevator as Josh was taken to be assessed in the ER. Waiting for them were Rachel, CJ, Toby, Donna and Leo. Dr Bartlet was standing with the waiting medical team.

Rachel ran forward to see Josh; her hand flew to her mouth as she saw her son. Tears rolled down her cheeks, "Joshua, oh my Joshua. What have they done to you?"

Sam and Rachel hugged as Josh was whisked into the room that was guarded by agents.

They were shown into the waiting room. So familiar, the third time they had waited for news of Josh. Donna busied herself getting coffees for people, CJ and Toby discussed what to tell the press, Leo updated the President and Sam and Rachel sat in silence holding hands.

Eventually Br Bartlet came in to update them. "Okay he's going up to ICU for tonight as they are worried he might have some side effects from the drugs and he is having an occasional arrhythmia. He's dehydrated and on IV fluids. Working down he has a laceration to his head which we think he got in the crash. It's been cleaned and sutured. He has obviously been punched in the face but luckily nothing is broken just severely bruised and a few more lacerations which needed attention. His left arm has two fractures and he will need surgery to pin them, but for now he has back-slab to immobilise it. The plaster has been removed and he has normal circulation and no lasting damage. He has a bladder infection due to a dirty catheter that was put in and an infection at the IV site due also to dirty equipment."

"Dr Bartlet do you think they reused the equipment?" Sam was thinking about the 'Infectors' that had been housed there.

Understanding what Sam was asking, "We believe the equipment was used as single use but the doctor's hygiene was poor. They are going to do blood tests for hepatitis and HIV, if you give permission. Josh doesn't have capacity to make any decisions at the moment." Abigail Bartlet looked troubled as she spoke. The sight of Josh being in such mental trauma was distressing for her. God only knows how Sam and Rachel were dealing with it.

"Yes of course I give permission." This wasn't the first time Sam had used the medical power of attorney he held for Josh.

"Sam they are going to get a psychiatrist to see him later, but if his metal state doesn't improve he may have to go to the psychiatric unit."

"No! I won't have him in a place like that. It will be the end of him. No one will trust him again. I'll take him home and get private care for him. I'll get Dr Keyworth." Sam was vehement. "I'll help you, he's not going to some institution." Rachel was just as vehement.

Whatever Abigail Bartlet was about to say was interrupted.

Mike came in to the room followed by a man pushing a trolley with a TV and DVD player. "I need you to see this. It's what they had Josh watching."

Mike set up the TV and everyone gathered round to watch in shocked silence. The images before them were mostly computer generated from press pictures. It was very realistic. Josh being shot, blood all over his chest, a house on fire, Joanie's grave, screams, gunshots and sirens on the sound track. Then Sam, a gunshot and Sam with blood on him. A body bag being unzipped to show the face of a now dead Sam. All the time the screams and sirens interspersed with classical music, brass bands playing Christmas carols, and all to start again round in a loop Josh being shot, house burning, Joanie's grave and Sam being shot, blood and in a body bag.

CJ walked to Sam and pulled him into a hug. "I just need to hold you to make sure it's not real. Poor Josh, no wonder he can't cope with what he saw."

"He was sleep deprived, drugged, dehydrated, frightened, in pain and then they left him alone in the dark and exposed him to that repeatedly." Mike confirmed what had happened.

"Torture, he was tortured to within an inch of his sanity." Toby's anger showed in his voice.

"They must have known about the PTSD. I mean the actual details. It is so specifically designed to trigger him in the worst possible way." Leo surmised.

"He thinks I'm dead. I have to show him I'm not dead. I have to go to him." Sam tried to get out of the room but was stopped by the First Lady.

"Sam we need to get some specialist advice. Call Dr Keyworth, Josh needs him." Sam nodded.

In the end Donna made the call. Reminding Stanley what Josh had told her when she asked why he was getting Josh to see someone else. "He's not too easy a case for you anymore Dr Keyworth." He agreed to come day after tomorrow as it was hoped Josh would be medically stable by then.

TBC for the final part


	10. Chapter 10

Thanks for the feedback.

Acknowledgements are on first page

Final instalment, slash warning (yes there is sex here). Josh isn't in the first person in part 10.

I am an RN but not a mental health one! I hope any out there will give me some creative licence when we are treating PTSD please.

CHAPTER 39

Stanley Keyworth had arrived. Just after Donna called he had spoken over the phone to the medical doctor who was treating Josh and the psychiatrist who had assessed him. He had advised a period of sedation which should be gradually lightened at which point hopefully Josh would go into a natural sleep. So far the plan was working. Dr Keyworth had delayed his arrival so they could be sure the drugs used by Marco's gang to keep him awake were out of Josh's system. It also allowed for the surgery on his arm to take place. Once all this had been accomplished Josh was sedated. He was now in a natural sleep and it was just a question of waiting to see how he would be when he woke up. At no point up until he was sedated had Josh even shown he was aware of the people around him, so locked was he into his nightmare of sounds and visions.

CHAPTER 40

It was the scream that woke Sam. Primal and full of anguish, at first he didn't recognise it as coming from the man in the bed. A man he knew almost as well as he knew himself. Once reality seeped into his sleep filled brain Sam jumped out of the chair and stood next to the hospital bed where his lover lay thrashing in his sleep. Sam instinctively reached to sooth Josh by stroking his hair.

"Josh baby sshh it's okay. You're safe now. I'm here. I'm here with you. Baby you're safe, sshh, sshh." Sam pressed the nurse call and continued his attempts to sooth the now silently sobbing Josh.

"Mr Seaborn are you okay?" The nurse queried.

"He's waking up but he's having a nightmare I think." Sam was obviously upset by his seeming inability to provide Josh with the reassurance he needed.

The nurse checked Josh's vitals and stroked his shoulder, "It's okay honey you just relax we are going look after you. You're safe here sugar."

"Stay with him and just keep doing what you're doing. I'll get the doctor." The nurse told Sam before she left the room.

Josh's sobs began to subside and he appeared to be sleeping again. Sam got a damp washcloth and wiped Josh's tear streaked face, all the time speaking softly and lovingly to him. Stroking his face, hair, chest, shoulder and anywhere he could. Once he cleaned his face he leaned down and kissed Josh gently on the lips. "Come back to me Josh. I don't know what to do without you. I miss you. I love you so much."

The nurse returned with the doctor and Stanley Keyworth. After checking Josh briefly the nurse and doctor left.

"What happened Sam?" Stanley stood next to Sam as they both looked down at Josh.

"He screamed and then he was thrashing about then all of a sudden he was sobbing. No sound, just shoulders shaking, sobbing with tears running down his face. He looked so distressed. It was awful." Sam's voice threatened to break as he spoke but he managed to hold it together.

"Did he open his eyes or say anything?" Stanley put his hand on Sam's shoulder he could see how upset Sam was.

"No just the scream but his eyes were closed the whole time." Sam turned to face the trauma specialist. "Stanley do you think he's going to come out of this? I mean enough to work again and function?"

Stanley paused, Sam's eyes were begging for something positive, something to hold onto. "Sam I honestly can't say at this point. I think we need to take this day by day. He has suffered a tremendously traumatic event. The film was made specifically to do this to him. Let's see how we go and concentrate on how he is when he wakes up." Sam nodded and focused again on Josh.

"I have to make some calls, get someone to fetch me if he wakes up." Dr Keyworth squeezed Sam's shoulder and left the room.

Sam sank back on the chair next to the bed, closed his eyes and ran both hands through is hair and then down his face. He expelled a long breath. Taking Josh's hand he moved closer to the bed and rested his head on the side. "Please come back to me baby." He waited for his lover's response. Silence.

This time Sam was woken by pressure on his hand and a groan. Standing up he realised that Josh was now gripping his hand. He looked down at Josh. His eyes were open but still had a faraway look in them. "Josh." No response.

Sam shook Josh's shoulder with his freehand and said loudly, "Josh! Josh!"

Slowly Josh's eyes moved to look in Sam's direction. "Hey baby. I missed you." Sam smiled at Josh.

Josh stared at Sam, nodded slightly then whispered, "You came."

Tears rolled down Sam's face. He was so happy Josh had spoken to him and knew who he was. The nurse poked her head in and saw Josh's eyes were open. She left and returned with the doctor and Stanley again.

Sam stood silently by as the doctor checked Josh over. Josh continued to watch Sam as if trying to find a focal point. It was obvious he wasn't fully aware of his surroundings. He had to be asked things more than once and in very simple terms but would eventually comply with whatever the doctor or nurse wanted him to do. He was a long way from the Josh Lyman people were used to.

Stanley gestured to Sam that he would like to see Josh alone. Sam didn't like to leave Josh but understood he needed to be assessed. After the doctor and nurse left Sam kissed Josh goodbye. Josh didn't kiss back but seemed to watch Sam leave the room.

"Josh?"

Nothing.

"Josh look at me." This time Stanley stood closer to the bed and shook Josh's shoulder to get his attention. Slowly Josh's eyes made their way to look at Stanley.

"Josh do you remember me?"

Josh nodded slightly.

"What's my name Josh?"

Nothing.

"Josh what's my name?" Stanley was louder and more persistent.

"Stanley." Josh whispered.

"Good. I'm here to help you Josh. I need you to trust me. Focus on me Josh. I know you have other things you can see and hear at the moment but you must focus on me. Understand?"

Another nod.

"Josh what's your mom called?"

"Mom."

"Josh what's her name?"

Pause. A whisper, "Rachel."

"Good. Now who is the President?"

No response.

Stanley tried again, Josh! The President?"

"Here?"

"No Josh. What's the President's name?"

Pause, "Bartlet," was the barely audible reply.

"Okay, good. What month is it?"

Josh just stared beyond Stanley lost to some unseen scenario being played out only in his mind.

Stanley sighed. This was going to be tough.

CHAPTER 41

Stanley had given instructions that only one person at a time was to visit Josh so as not to confuse him further. Josh had responded best to Sam and nearly as well to Rachel, however even they barely got more than monosyllabic responses. Josh did not initiate conversation. It took even Sam a while to get Josh to register his presence. He did smile at Sam though and seemed to be able to focus on him for longer periods. Sam felt Josh was drawing strength from him and wanted to stay in the room. Stanley forbade him to do so, limiting visits to 15 minutes at a time. Sam was never far away, refusing to leave the hospital. Two days later there had been little change.

"Hey babe." Sam walked over to Josh's bedside and stroked his cheek. He leaned down and softly kissed Josh on the lips. Josh's eyes were open but unfocussed. "Josh, hey Josh." Sam shook his shoulder, "Look at me honey. Josh!"

Deep brown eyes turned to look at Sam slowly gaining their focus. A small smile was on his lips, not enough to show those amazing dimples, but taking Sam's breath away nonetheless. "Hey. I can feel you." Josh's voice was quiet but more than the whisper previously.

"Of course you can. You can always feel me." Sam was a little confused by Josh's statement, but was so happy Josh was talking he decided not to question him. He took Josh's hand and kissed his fingers. The lovers gazed at each other, the only sound came from the air changing in the special pressure relieving mattress Josh was laying on.

"I want to be with you forever." This was the most Josh had spoken since he had been rescued. Sam's heart swelled.

"We will be babe, together forever." Sam kissed Josh's lips again. Josh still didn't kiss back.

"Sam, is it quiet in your head, where your head is? Sam was unsure how to answer this strange question. He knew Josh was having auditory and visual hallucinations. Stanley had made it clear that Josh was probably hearing sirens and gunshots and seeing events at Rosslyn and possibly even the fire that took his sister from him. There must be a lot of noise in Josh's head.

"Yes Josh, it's quiet here in my head."

Josh smiled and then his face went blank as he was once again lost to the demons within him. Sam sighed but knew he had to go. He kissed Josh's forehead, "I'll see you later. I love you, please come back to me."

The following day Leo approached the agent outside Josh's hospital room planning on visiting his Deputy. The agent was preventing a small man in a brown suit from entering the room.

"What the hell is going on here?" Leo addressed the agent.

This man works in the hospital and wants to see Mr Lyman.

"Well you can't see him. What do you want?" Leo now spoke to the man.

"We have been asked to keep Mr Lyman in this room for another week, but he should really be in the Psychiatric wing. He is medically fit."

"So why are you trying to see him? You're not a doctor." Leo was getting impatient; he only had a limited amount of time and wanted to see Josh.

"I am a billing clerk. His insurance won't pay out for this, even with the backing of his Cardiologist. I have to serve him with this." The man held up a white envelope.

"You're billing him?" Leo was incredulous.

"We have to be paid, or he has to go." The man was adamant and even dared to make eye contact with Leo.

"You little rat. Do you know who he is? Do you?" Leo's voice was now loud and attracting attention.

"Yes Sir I know who he is, but I have a job to do." The man could no longer maintain eye contact.

"Come here!" Leo dragged the man to the nurses' office and one look made all the occupants leave quickly. Leo slammed the door.

"How dare you try to speak to him. He's in no fit state to deal with financial matters." Leo was trying hard to keep his voice together.

"I'm sorry Mr McGarry but I am just doing my job. I'm a billing clerk." He paused, "And we still have an unpaid bill. Do you know if he has the funds to pay the $7,000 owing?"

"I don't believe you!" Leo reached into his inside jacket pocket and pulled out a pen and check book. He wrote a check for the full amount and thrust it at the man. "NOW GO you leech!"

The man took the check and scuttled out of the room.

Leo took a deep breath and went in to see Josh.

"Hey Kid, how're you doing?" Leo squeezed Josh's shoulder to try to get his attention. He waited for Josh to pull himself away from the thoughts that seemed to capture him.

"Hey Leo."

"How are you feeling kid?" Leo knew Josh would not have processed the question when he first asked.

There was a pause then Josh said, "Sam was here."

Leo was a little confused bur decided to go with it. "Was he? Did that make you feel better?"

"Yes, don't be sad Leo. Look after my Mom."

This was the longest Josh had spoken to Leo since he had woken up. Leo was both pleased and disconcerted. He wasn't sure Josh was making sense. "You can look after her yourself when you are better."

Josh's eyes once again lost focus and Leo knew his time was up. He leaned down and kissed Josh's forehead. "See you soon Kid."

CHAPTER 42

The days went by and little by little Josh began to communicate more and showed greater awareness of his surroundings. He still struggled with seemingly complex questions losing the thread somewhere in the middle. Visiting was still restricted to one at a time by Stanley. The nightmares continued and Josh awoke screaming or sobbing most nights.

"I know how we can be together forever." Josh confided in Sam, as his lover sat by his bed.

"We are together, always Josh. I'm not going anywhere." Sam was becoming concerned with this familiar theme of Josh's conversation.

"I have a plan." Josh smiled at Sam. "Soon babe, soon."

Josh fell asleep and Sam sat and watched him replaying all the conversations they had had recently. He needed to speak to Stanley.

Stanley and Sam sat in a private office and Sam relayed all the things Josh had said. Stanley furrowed his brow. "I think we may have a problem. I need to speak to Rachel Lyman."

Sam stood next to Josh's bed, "Hey babe. Did you have a nice sleep?"

"Mmm. I'm still tired though. Always tired." Josh sighed and held Sam's hand.

"Josh I've got your Mom with me." Sam said the words exactly as Stanley had told him to. He wasn't happy about doing this he felt it would really upset Josh. Stanley admitted it was a gamble he thought it might bring things to a head and then Josh would be able to move on, but he agreed Josh would be upset and might get worse not better. He believed it was the only way to give Josh a little push.

"Hello Joshua. How are you?" Rachel had mixed feelings. She didn't want to see her son upset but was willing to try anything to get her Joshua back.

Josh looked from one to the other, "Mom?" It was barely more than whisper.

"I'm here son."

"You're with Sam?"

"Yes babe your Mom is here with me."

"When? How?" Tears rolled down Josh's cheeks.

"What do you mean Josh?" Rachel asked.

"Why are you with Sam? What happened?" Josh sounded like a lost child.

"I came from Florida, you were hurt." Rachel explained her presence.

"No how did you die?" Josh's voice broke as he sobbed.

"Joshua I'm not dead!" Rachel squeezed Josh's shoulder.

"I'm the only one who can see and feel Sam. He's dead. I saw him in the body bag. So you must be dead too."

"I'm not dead Josh. I wasn't hurt. They faked the film babe. It was a lie. They made it up, drugged you and forced you to watch it. It's not real." Sam held Josh's hand as he spoke.

"We are both alive and well and looking forward to having our Joshua back safe and sound at home." Rachel had gone to the other side of the bed and held on to Josh's other hand.

Tears still rolling down his cheeks Josh looked from one to the other, his confusion evident. "It was fake?"

"Yes babe." Sam squeezed Josh's hand.

"I thought you were dead. I don't want to live if you're dead. I would kill myself so we could be together."

Rachel inhaled sharply and put her free hand to her mouth, tears falling freely. It was Sam that spoke.

"Don't say that Josh. I don't want to hear you say something like that. I love you and hearing you say that breaks my heart."

"It's true Sam."

"You have to promise me you wouldn't do that. I would never forgive you in this life or any other if you did a thing like that. Promise me Josh." Sam's voice was steely as he spoke to his lover.

Josh hesitated.

"Promise me Josh."

"I promise."

CHAPTER 43

One week later Josh had improved enough to go home. Sam had arranged a week off and then Leo and Toby had allowed him to work part time and from home at times. Rachel was staying and she and Sam had hired a nurse. Sam had also paid Stanley to remain a bit longer and he was staying in the same hotel as Leo at Leo's expense.

Sam watched as Josh was hoisted from the bed into his new wheelchair. It seemed strange for Josh to be so compliant and Sam hoped he would soon hear his beloved complain and argue again. Josh was unable to wheel himself as him arm was still mending so Sam pushed him to the cab and up the ramps while the driver strapped him in. They drove home in silence holding hands.

Sam had bought a board with handles and a sliding sheet built in to enable Josh to transfer into bed etc semi-independently. When Sam wasn't there Matt, the male nurse they had hired, would be able to help. Rachel would make sure he ate but couldn't do the physical things Josh needed. Stanley would visit for twice daily therapy sessions. There was no talk about Josh going back to work. Josh never mentioned politics or the Whitehouse.

Once Sam and Josh were through the door Rachel rushed over to Josh enveloping him in a hug. "Hello sweetie. Are you hungry? I made your favourite apricot chicken."

Josh looked around seeming overawed to be home. "I...I'm not really hungry. I just want to go to bed please." Sam and Rachel exchanged glances over Josh's head.

Sam came around in front of Josh and knelt down, "Babe you should eat something before you go bed. Just a little, please?"

"Okay, a little." Josh agreed and Sam pushed him over to the dining table. Josh didn't want to get out of his wheelchair.

Sam and Rachel watched as Josh stared into space and ignored the food before him.

"Josh, Joshua."

"Huh?"

"Eat your dinner." Rachel instructed her son.

Josh looked down at the plate with a surprised expression as if he hadn't known it was even there. He picked up his fork and pushed the food around his plate. "Joshua eat something." His Mom said sternly. Josh slowly ate four forkfuls of food before laying it down on his plate.

"I really need to go to bed now please." The fact that this was the second time Josh had said please didn't escape Sam and Rachel. Josh was very well mannered but this was unusual for him at home. "Here I'll help you babe." Sam stood and pushed Josh into the bedroom. After Josh's accident the couple had moved from their townhouse into a more appropriate but large apartment. They had had certain areas adapted to make it easier for Josh to be independent. The kitchen, the bathroom, his closet, and of course his car had all been adapted to meet his needs. They were also very aware of space, so the apartment was uncluttered. Josh had accepted help from Sam but was reluctant to let anyone else assist, not that he needed much. Carl helped when access to buildings was an issue and when Josh had to go on Air Force One etc. His office and a cubicle in the men's room in the Whitehouse had been changed to meet his needs. He also had designated parking to be sure he was near the door and had space around the car to get himself and his wheelchair in and out. He was fiercely independent so his behaviour now was of great concern to Sam.

"I got this for you so you can slide into bed until your arm is better." Sam showed the board to Josh. "See you can do it with one hand if someone holds it for you."

Josh sighed, "Thanks."

"Do you want to have a shower before you go to bed, or maybe a bath?" Sam knelt down to be eye to eye with Josh.

"Just want to go to bed."

Sam nodded, got up and pulled back to covers. He then went to Josh's dresser and got out some pyjamas. He positioned the chair next to the bed and helped Josh slide over to sit on the side. He then lifted Josh's legs and leaned him against the pillows he had arranged for Josh. Josh's hair tickled against his cheek and he couldn't resist kissing his head.

"Do you want me to undress you? You seem really tired." Sam asked trying to keep the eagerness out of his voice.

"Please, if that's okay. Sam I…I can't, you know, not yet. I'm sorry." Josh looked up at Sam.

"Of course, babe. Don't worry. Know that I love you and when you're ready I'll be here." Sam undressed Josh and helped him on with his pyjamas, resisting the urge to linger over his lover's body.

Once Josh was settled in bed Sam went to get his medication. He brought in the tablets and a glass of water. Josh took them without a word.

"Goodnight Josh." Sam kissed him lightly on the lips and was pleasantly surprised when he felt Josh kiss him back, just as lightly.

"Sam?"

"Yes?"

"I love you. Thank you."

"I love you too, now go to sleep and I'll be in to join you soon."

Sam watched Josh as he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

As he stood there he was aware of Rachel coming to stand next to him, he had left the door open when he came back with the medication and she had been watching from the door. They stood in silence watching the man they both loved Sam's arm around Rachel's waist. Eventually by mutual agreement they both left Josh to sleep. Sam leaving the door slightly ajar.

Two hours later Sam and Rachel were watching an old movie drinking tea in the lounge. When they heard the screaming they both ran to Josh and Sam's bedroom. Josh was lying on his back, he thrown the covers off and was thrashing around screaming. "Nooooooooooo, noooooooooooooo. Please nooooo. Help him! Help him!"

Sam ran to him. "Josh it's okay, sshh baby. It's okay. Please Josh wake up. I'm here." Sam repeated his words and stroked Josh's hair until he began to calm.

Josh opened his eyes staring around. He finally focused on Sam, his breath ragged. "Sam? Sam? You're here. I saw…I…saw….you. I saw you. D...dead. You were dead!"

"It's okay. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. Come on now go back to sleep." Sam stroked Josh's hair and kissed his face until his breathing evened out and he was sleeping again.

"When will those stop, do you think?" Rachel whispered.

"Stanley doesn't know. He has three. One where I'm dead, one where he's shot and no one finds him and one where he can't find his way out of a burning building but can here a girl screaming. Stanley thinks the one where I'm dead will fade as it didn't happen. The other two are ones he had before this happened. They are just worse now and more often. He does think they will decrease in frequency and hopefully go back to how they were before."

"I didn't know he still had nightmares about the fire." Rachel was quite stunned to hear this.

"Sometimes, not often. When he's tired and stressed or if something reminds him. I'm going to turn in now. He might feel better if he's got someone with him."

"Good idea. Good night Sam."

"Night Rachel."

Sam cleaned his teeth, changed and slipped into bed with Josh. He rolled Josh onto his side and spooned behind him. He soon fell into a deep sleep with his arms protectively around the man he loved.

CHAPTER 44

Josh was still sleeping when Sam awoke. Looking at the clock on the night stand he saw it was 7.30. Matt would be here soon. Sam left Josh sleeping and headed to the bathroom. Once showered he checked on Josh, who was lying on his back in bed wide awake but gazing off at something unseen.

"Hey babe, good morning." Sam sat on the edge of the bed and kissed Josh's lips softly.

Josh looked at Sam and gave a small smile. "I like being home."

"Do you want some breakfast before Matt arrives?" Sam asked stroking Josh's hand.

"Matt?" Josh looked a little confused.

"The nurse who is going to help you, remember? I can't be here all the time after this week so he is coming while I am here so you can get used to him. It's just while you can't use your arm. Not for long." Sam explained for the third time.

"Okay, if you think that's best. You'll be here at first though?" Josh sounded so unsure it made Sam want to tell Leo and Toby that he wouldn't be back until Josh was well. He knew that wasn't possible in reality.

"I'll be here at first yes, but I won't be here all the time after this week." Sam reinforced this as he felt Josh may have difficulties when Sam was no longer there all day.

Josh nodded. The doorbell rang. "I'll get it." Rachel called out.

"That'll be Matt. I need to go speak with him. Will you be okay for a few minutes?" Sam could see Josh was nervous about having a stranger in their home with him not being himself. Josh nodded and squeezed Sam's hand.

Sam came back into the bedroom a little while later with Rachel and a young man in a blue scrubs with a private healthcare company's logo on it.

"Josh this is Matt Hughes. He's going to be looking after you for a few weeks." Sam brought Matt over to meet Josh.

"Pleased to me you Mr Lyman." Matt held out his hand to Josh.

Josh didn't take it but looked at Sam and his Mom. He looked back at Matt. "Josh. Call me Josh."

"Josh great, thank you." Matt smiled and withdrew his hand. He had been briefed by Sam and Stanley so knew roughly what to expect.

"So why don't we all have a coffee and get acquainted?" Rachel suggested.

"Perhaps Sam and I could help you get up and in the shower Josh ready for that coffee?" Matt asked.

"O…okay. I guess." Josh agreed.

"Sam perhaps you could orientate me as we go along and Josh you must tell me if at any point you are uncomfortable or worried. Understand?" Matt enquired. "I understand." Josh said while seeking out Sam's hand for reassurance.

An hour later they were all sat round the table drinking coffee and eating toast. Matt, Sam and Rachel were chatting trying to draw Josh into the conversation. Their persistence paid off when Josh actually initiated some input. It was a little thing but a huge milestone in his recovery. Sam couldn't help but kiss him on the cheek. Matt left after breakfast and said he would return tomorrow. The idea was to introduce him gradually for longer periods of time to prepare Josh for when Sam returned to work.

Stanley arrived as Matt left. He accepted a coffee and was left alone with Josh.

"Are you pleased to be home?"

"Yes."

"What do you like about being home Josh?"

"Sam." Josh smiled.

"Did you sleep well last night?" Stanley was building up to the more difficult issues. He had spoken to Rachel on the phone and knew about the nightmare.

"I…I think so, although I'm still tired." Josh faltered. His mind was muddled and nightmares got jumbled up with some of the things he still saw and heard while awake.

"You had a nightmare. Do you remember it?" Stanley leaned forward towards Josh.

"I'm not sure. My head…it's….noisy." Josh pinched the bridge of his nose.

"What do you mean by noisy Josh?" Stanley pushed a little.

Josh's breathing got a little faster, this didn't go unnoticed by Stanley. "Josh?"

"There's noise, noise all…all the…all the time. It…it doesn't stop." Josh was getting distressed as Stanley was getting him to focus on something he was trying to avoid.

"Josh can you tell me what the noise is?"

Josh shook his head and looked down away from Stanley. "Josh?"

Without looking up Josh again shook his head. "Josh look at me." "Josh!"

Josh raised his head trying to focus on Stanley, tears rolling down his cheeks. "Focus on me Josh, focus on my voice, and shut the noise out for now. Shut the noise out."

"I CAN'T! I CAN'T! I can't, I can't." Josh sobbed in earnest now. Sam alerted to Josh's shouts appeared in the doorway not sure whether to go in and comfort him. He caught Stanley's eye and nod and went to kneel down next to Josh. He put his arms around him and soothed him with touches and words until Josh quietened.

"Let's take a break now Josh. Get some sleep and I'll come back in four hours and we will talk about the noise."

Josh barely nodded.

Rachel showed Stanley to the door. "Will he be okay?"

"I think he will eventually. I have a feeling his PTSD may be closer to the surface after this, but I very am hopeful he'll be able to go back to work." Stanley paused, "Next week I will be introducing him to a local specialist. I will be here for a couple of transition sessions but then I have to get back."

Sam helped Josh use the bathroom and then lay down on the bed. Sam lay down with him stoking and kissing him until he fell asleep.

CHAPTER 45

The next few days followed a pattern with Matt helping Josh more and more and Sam pulling back a little from the physical. He took care of Josh's emotional wellbeing, while Rachel looked after his nutritional needs. Stanley and Josh made headway, but Josh still got distressed towards the end of each session. The sessions completely drained him and he would sleep for at least two hours after each one. At night came the nightmares. All too soon Sam had to go to work.

"Josh you have to let me go babe." Sam tried to disentangle himself from a very clingy Josh Lyman.

"Please stay. I don't want to be on my own."

"Josh be reasonable. Your Mom's here, Matt will be here soon and Stanley will be by with the new guy. You are not alone. I have to go to work today." Sam undid Josh's grip and held his hand.

"Okay." Josh mumbled into the pillow.

Sam kissed Josh's head and headed for the bathroom.

Sam's thoughts kept drifting to Josh during the day. He was only meant to be working until 5, but national events had overtaken him Leo had scheduled a Senior Staff meeting at 8. At 11pm he was still there but in the Roosevelt room. "Leo I really have to go. I need to get back to Josh." Rachel had called three times; Josh was getting worried about where Sam was. Sam had spoken to him on the phone but Josh had been difficult to placate. He needed to see him. To know he was okay.

"I thought Rachel and the nurse were there. Sam I'm sorry but we need you here especially with Josh out. This thing isn't going to resolve itself." Leo looked tired.

Sam sighed. "I know but the nurse had to go and if Josh needs physical help Rachel can't do that." He paused then said quietly, "Leo he's having some really bad nightmares. He needs me."

"I know son, please just give me one more hour and don't come in until 8 tomorrow."

"Okay." Sam looked back at the papers he was working on; a response to the latest crisis. His phone rang again.

"Sam you have to come home." Rachel sounded frantic.

"Rachel calm down, what's wrong?" Sam stood in preparation to leave.

"He's having the nightmare where you die. I woke him up but I can't convince him you're not dead. Sam he really needs you."

"Okay I'm coming." Looking at Leo who had sensed the urgency and nodded his consent.

By the time Sam got to Josh he was sobbing his heart out. Rachel was holding him and telling him over and over that Sam was coming and he was very much alive.

"Josh." Sam took over from Rachel. "Josh I'm here. Ssshh I'm here. I'm okay. I'm sorry I had to stay at work so long. I won't do it again babe. Sshh now." Sam stroked and petted Josh as he held him and gently rocked him.

"I…I…saw you dead. You…you weren't here. I thought it was real." Josh had calmed with Sam's tender ministrations.

"It was just a dream Remember what Stanley told you, they put it in your head. It's not real." Sam had laid Josh back against the pillows and held his face in both hands. He looked directly into Josh's eyes, such beautiful brown eyes. Such confused and troubled eyes. At that moment Sam wanted to strike out against the people who did this to Josh. Brought this strong and wonderful man to this. He hated them, he hated them all. Taking a deep breath he took charge of his emotions. He needed to be there for Josh and help him through this darkness to the other end. Hate would consume him and be a destructive force. "Go to sleep now I'm here. I'm going to get into bed with you and hold you until you sleep. Okay?" Josh nodded. After a while they both slept.

CHAPTER 46

Six weeks after Josh got home from the hospital he was able to use his left arm. He was having physical therapy from Matt to regain the strength he had lost. Carl had been over and was doing well, ready to return to work. Until Josh actually saw him he hadn't truly believed he had survived. Sam had sent flowers and a note to Billy's funeral, as had President Bartlet.

Josh was seeing Dr Aaron Cox the PTSD specialist Stanley had referred him to, but now only twice a week. Josh was doing a little work from home. It had started with Donna bringing him briefing memos to keep him in the loop. He had shown interest and could concentrate if they weren't too long. Gradually he began to complain about being bored and this made everyone surprisingly happy. A whining Josh Lyman was what they had all been waiting for. After another month he went back to work and his Mom went home. He still had difficulty at times and stared into space but he was easily brought back with a touch or a whisper. He did react to loud noises now though. The first time he was in Senior Staff and Leo unthinkingly slammed a book down on his desk in frustration at some stupid Republican Josh nearly fell out of his wheelchair. He had a panic attack and it took a full 20 minutes for his breathing to get fully back to normal and to stop sweating. Like everything this got better but didn't totally go away.

EPILOGUE (SEX WARNING)

Sam and Josh got their lives back to as normal as it could be. Josh wasn't being asked to testify as there was enough evidence against The Dark. The politicians involved resigned and Coleman was prosecuted.

Sam and Josh lay in bed just enjoying being together. Josh was on his side against Sam who lay on his back. Josh was idly running his hand up and down Sam's body causing Sam to squirm in pleasure. His hand got lower and lower and finally began stroking Sam's cock. Sam groaned and bucked his hips. Josh gripped Sam harder moving his hand up and down in smooth strokes. Suddenly Josh was on his back, Sam had rolled him over. Sam kissed Josh intensely opening his mouth with his tongue. Josh reciprocated making needy sounds in his throat. Sam worked his way down Josh's throat stopping at his ears and his collarbone as now Josh squirmed. His breathing becoming more and more erratic. The sound making Sam even harder. He knew what Josh loved and needed. They had been experimenting since Josh had been paralysed and Sam knew he could make Josh orgasm if he maintained the intense onslaught on his upper body. It had surprised them that men can orgasm without actually ejaculating. Sam moved down to Josh's nipples sucking, licking, biting, never stopping Josh was close now. Sam continued to drive his lover over the edge. Josh's body stiffened as he cried out then relaxed. Sam looked at Josh who had a full dimpled smile on his face.

"Come on up here. I want you." His voice was husky and very sexy, causing Sam's cock to jerk as if it were directly connected to Josh's vocal chords.

Sam climbed further up and straddled Josh's head. He slid his now very hard cock into Josh's beautiful warm wet mouth. Josh's eyes twinkled and Sam began to fuck his mouth for all he was worth. When he came he came hard Josh eagerly swallowed it all and continued to suck and lick until Sam was totally finished.

The lovers lay together enjoying the afterglow of their lovemaking and just being as one. Turning to each other they kissed lovingly. "I love you Sam. Thank you. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you." Josh felt his words were inadequate to express his feelings.

"I love you with all my heart. I wouldn't be anywhere else." Sam responded.

The two slipped into a dreamless and restful sleep.

The End.


End file.
